


An Example of Miscommunication

by sadmemes



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alexander ‘Tom Cat’ Hamilton, Angst, Bottom Thomas Jefferson, Crying, Hurt Alexander Hamilton, Hurt Thomas Jefferson, Hurt/Comfort, James Madison is pissed, John Laurens fucks up, Lack of Communication, Leaked Nudes, M/M, Making Out, Miscommunication, Modern Day Setting, NOT Non Con, Nudes, Sexual Content, Thomas is inexperienced, Top Alexander Hamilton, all characters are in their twenties (apart from Washington), basically the boys don’t communicate, but slightly Dub Con i guess, some smut, they both need hugs tbh, yeah I don’t see him as a bottom
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2020-07-24 22:04:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 25,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20021758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadmemes/pseuds/sadmemes
Summary: Anyone who worked alongside Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson and had been observant enough to notice the increasing romantic and sexual tension between the pair over the past few months wouldn’t have been surprised to hear about the two men finally acting upon their feelings.The two individuals involved, however, genuinely hadn’t planned for things to escalate.OrAlexander and Thomas finally act upon their feelings for each other, but the pair refrain from communicating during the encounter and Angst ensues.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hey everyone! this is just a short fic that i wrote when inspiration struck, because obviously the Hamilton fandom needs more angst. 
> 
> also, i am still updating ‘Starvation in Magenta Suits’ and will be continuing with that fanfiction asap, but idk here’s just something that i wrote on the side :) 
> 
> hope you enjoy reading, and please feel free to leave kudos and a comment telling me about your thoughts! honestly reading your opinions, thoughts, questions and reactions to my writing makes my day, and i’ll make sure to respond. 
> 
> Warnings: some Sexual Content and descriptions (nothing is non-con, but you could interpret this fic to include mild dub-con because of misunderstandings and lack of communication). But yeah if you’d rather not read about that then this probably isn’t the fic for you!

Anyone who worked alongside Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson and had been observant enough to notice the increasing romantic and sexual tension between the pair over the past few months wouldn’t have been surprised to hear about the two men finally acting upon their feelings. 

The two individuals involved, however, genuinely hadn’t planned for things to escalate one summer’s evening. One moment Alexander had been observing Thomas casually lounging against the couch present in the immigrant’s apartment, accompanied by his familiar expression of raised eyebrows and a disdainful smirk, and then out of nowhere, Alex found himself leaning forwards to connect his lips with the Virginian’s. 

It was as if time itself stopped.

Alexander’s heartbeat pounded against his chest as he moved his lips passionately against Thomas’ plush ones, and his mind screamed how truly beautiful the other man was. Alex had always known that Thomas Jefferson was an attractive man, but this fact became even more apparent as the immigrant pressed his body against his taller companion’s without breaking mouth contact. Alexander’s eyes fluttered closed as he allowed himself to become consumed by the man he’d usually refer to as his rival. 

Everything about Thomas was intoxicating, such as the smell of his horrendously expensive cologne combined with his coconut scented skin, the man’s groomed mane of curly hair that appeared incapable of ever looking bad, that annoyingly arrogant smirk the Virginian often wore when observing Alexander, the way Thomas’ eyes lit up when they filled with intelligence, passion or amusement, and....holy shit, Alexander could feel how physically fit the Virginian was through his awful magenta suit as their bodies maintained contact. 

Fuck, he was beautiful. 

It took the man in question a moment to overcome his apparent shock at Alexander’s physical advances, but Thomas Jefferson soon began to reciprocate. His lips gently moved against Alexander’s to participate in the passionate kiss, as if Thomas was truly savouring the unfamiliar taste, feel and overall experience of the other man’s mouth. Alex let out an involuntary moan, and slid his hands over the Virginian’s hips before slowly pressing the other man further into his couch. 

Refraining from breaking their kiss, Alexander entwined his fingers into Thomas’ curls, while the taller man ran his thumbs against the immigrant’s stubble-covered jaw and cheeks. After a few more minutes, the temperature of Alexander’s living room suddenly seemed to be unbearably hot as the pair continued kissing and making involuntary clothed thrusts with their hips against each other. Alex found himself becoming forcibly aware of how tight his suit trousers were growing to be, and was sure that Thomas Jefferson would be experiencing a similar problem. 

Without thinking too deeply, which was an incredibly rare occurrence, Alexander removed his hands from their exploration of Thomas’ hair and neck to run down the man’s toned upper body, silently longing for the Virginian to be rid of his shirt so Alexander could have the wonderful experience of viewing the man’s bare chest. The immigrant’s strong and experienced hands continued moving downwards, and Thomas’ breath hitched sharply as Alexander placed his palms over the other man’s crotch. 

An uncontrollable feeling overcame Alexander as he began to fondle and palm Thomas vigorously through his suit trousers, the extent of his experience in such physical matters immediately becoming apparent in his precise and professional touches. 

Alex couldn’t place his finger on the specific definition of the emotion he was experiencing, but it felt more than simply general arousal. Desire? Lust? Passion? He wasn’t too sure, but whatever it was that he was feeling thrummed through Alex’s veins as if his entire body was setting alight.

He could liken the feeling to one that he often experienced when verbally battling Thomas Jefferson during their routinely cabinet meetings; the overwhelming need and desire to overpower his opponent. The taller man was someone who could verbally and mentally counter Alex, and the immigrant craved to break the Virginian.

But, right now, not with words, nor embarrassment, nor comebacks, nor insults...

With pleasure.

Alexander didn’t want to make the other man suffer, unless it would be purely associated with getting the Virginian to moan. He knew that he needed Thomas in an undefinable way. He wanted to witness his rival submitting in a way that would make both men scream, and surprisingly not with anger nor indignation like during their cabinet battles.

The euphoric desire to make Thomas Jefferson feel good occupied every part of Alexander’s mind, and he intended on giving the Virginian everything they both wanted. He longed to touch every part of the other man, witness Thomas coming undone and letting go, feel his rival bucking and straining with pleasure beneath him, hear the Virginian begging and moaning for more....

As if on cue, Thomas let out a surprisingly high pitched whimper as Alexander continued his ministrations with renewed passion, which the Federalist interpreted to be as a result of the overwhelming pleasure he was providing.

A gentle smirk found its way onto Alex’s lips as he continued ravaging Thomas’ mouth; he wouldn’t have expected the usually arrogant and spiteful Virginian to be submissive in the bedroom, but the man seemed to be continuously full of surprises, and Alexander loved and craved the thrill that being the dominant individual during sex created. 

Sensing that the pair were ready for the next step, the immigrant deepened the kiss shared between the two men, smoothly undid the zip of the Virginian’s trousers, and used his hand to confidently breach into the confines of his partner’s boxers. The rhythmic thumping of the pair’s heartbeats and Jefferson’s breathy gasps were the only sounds Alexander could hear, and were music to his ears.

Suddenly, Alexander felt Thomas Jefferson’s whole body freeze, and the man let out a choked sob as Alex’s hand came into contact with exactly what occupied and lay within the Virginian’s underwear. 

Immediately feeling the change in his rival’s physicality, Alex opened his eyes to meet with the other man’s deep hazel orbs. He had expected to observe Thomas’ eyes to be blown wide with pleasure and express nothing except desire, and for the other man to potentially beg for Alexander to resume his ministrations. 

However, the Virginian’s pupils were filled with what Alexander could label as panic. Beneath him, Thomas Jefferson looked...scared, and such a foreign and unexpected emotion being displayed upon the man’s face startled Alex.

After a moment, Thomas slowly removed his mouth from the immigrant’s, shaking breaths ghosting over his swollen lips, and Alexander felt his heart flood with ice at the unexpected and unspoken change between the pair. 

“Thomas? You alright?” Alex asked tentatively, his breathing heavy as he maintaining eye contact with the Virginian. His hand remained inside Thomas’ pants and in physical contact with the man’s penis, but all movements had stilled between the pair. 

“I...I...I’m...” Thomas stuttered quietly, his usual arrogantly confident drawl having vanished and only making the Federalist more concerned. 

“Hey, it’s okay. Are we going too fast?” Alexander murmured, pressing what he desired to be a comforting kiss to the taller man’s neck. Perhaps Thomas wasn’t used to being intimate with such an enthusiastic and non-stop sexual partner.

Without thinking, Alexander’s fist that remained curled around Thomas’ penis gave a gentle stroke against the other man, in an automatic attempt to remove any of the Virginian’s doubts or worries and install pleasure into the man’s mind.

In an instant, Thomas was pressing the palms of his hands forcefully against Alexander’s chest to shove the other man off from his body. All physical contact between the two men vanished as Alexander fell backwards onto the other end of the couch, a shocked expression spreading across his features at the sudden turn of events.

Thomas’ eyes remained downcast as he readjusted himself on the far end of the couch, his hands subtly shaking as he pulled up the zip of his trousers and began flattening down his suit to remove any wrinkles or creases caused by his rival’s ministrations. Alexander stared with his mouth slightly open, confusion and dread pooling in the depths of his stomach. 

“Thomas?” 

The Virginian stood up from the couch and straightened up, his hands rapidly attempting to unfold his crumpled magenta jacket that lay nearby. The man still refrained from speaking, or even looking in Alex’s direction, and the immigrant hastily stood up from the couch. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Alexander asked firmly, placing himself directly in his rival’s eye-line and essentially forcing Thomas to meet his questioning gaze. 

After a brief moment that felt more like an hour, Thomas Jefferson connected his eyes with Alex’s as a strangely blank expression spread across his features. 

“Hamilton...we can’t do this.” 

Thomas’ southern accent sounded completely hollow, and Alexander felt a stab of pain as he noticed how the man he’d previously been making out with had refrained from using his first and personal name. 

“What? Why not?” he replied immediately, every ounce inside of him desiring an explanation from the Virginian.

“....we can’t” Thomas said bluntly, breaking eye contact with his rival and placing invisible barriers around himself as he ran his hands over his face and breathed deeply through his nose.

Alexander was beyond confused. Thomas Jefferson had accepted his invitation when he’d invited the man over to his home! Sure, Alexander had initially intended for the pair to simply have dinner and casually discuss his upcoming financial plan, but things had escalated as the rivals had remarkably got along and finally acted upon the various tensions present between them. 

The lingering glances, brief moments of physical contact and spoken sexual innuendos the pair had shared over the past few months weren’t imagined by Alex. Hell, both men had even shared intimate photos with each other! This was no case of unequal attraction or unrequited crushing; it was obvious that Thomas Jefferson had returned Alexander’s feelings and implications. 

Well, until now, apparently.

However, Alexander naturally wasn’t going to give up and let the Virginian simply disappear without having some of his painful confusion dissipate. 

“Thomas, talk to me. What’s wrong? I thought...I thought you wanted this too? Tell me what I’m doing wrong” Alexander asked, his voice straining slightly as he took ahold of the taller man’s hands and rubbed soothing circles along his skin with his thumbs. He hadn’t intended to make Thomas upset or uncomfortable...and Thomas had to know that. 

A moment passed where Alexander observed what appeared to be a splintering in Thomas’ emotionless expression, and he was sure that his rival would break and explain exactly what was going on in his head. 

However, Thomas Jefferson simply cleared his throat, composed himself, and pulled his hands out of Alexander’s grip with surprising force. 

“You thought wrong. How...why would I ever want this with you, Hamilton? You’re delusional” Thomas stated, his voice suddenly possessing a sharp edge as his usual arrogance verbally returned.

The man shrugged on his magenta jacket and made towards the front door as if the conversation was over, but the burning passion and pain within Alexander made him roughly grab the Virginian’s wrist and hold him back. 

“I can’t believe you!” Alex spoke, his aggressive and accusing tone and causing Jefferson’s eyes to widen slightly. It was as if the pair were facing off in a heated cabinet battle, and Alexander felt the familiar thrill he experienced when he was about to spit venom with his words.

“Stop fucking lying! I am not delusional, or stupid, Jefferson. You...you wanted this too. What’s the problem? What, are you scared? Ashamed? Aww, did your southern, small minded parents drill homophobia into your tiny brain, and now you’re having a breakdown because you can’t process your desires? Or...are you worried that you’re too much of a pussy to handle me? Scared of letting me wreck you? Can’t handle this dick?” 

Alexander’s explosive rant hissed into Thomas’s ear, the shorter man’s internal pain and sadness causing his words to be sharply cruel and personal in his defence as he glared into the Virginian’s face. 

Jefferson’s eyes narrowed with defiance and something deeper that resembled pain at Alexander’s words. 

“Not everyone wants to sleep with you, Hamilton. Leave me alone” 

“Fine! Get your cowardly, overgrown, low self esteem ass the fuck out of my house!” Alexander shouted as Thomas yanked his wrist free from the shorter man’s grip and strode towards Alex’s apartment door. 

A moment later, the sound of the front door slamming resonated powerfully around the apartment and in Alexander’s ears. Silence greeted the immigrant as he remained frozen, his chest internally reeling with anger, pain and confusion.

Coming back to his senses slightly and momentarily blocking out his pain with anger, Alex stormed over to his couch and furiously flopped onto the furniture, before inhaling a whiff of Thomas’ overpriced cologne. Cursing the Virginian lowly, the immigrant instantly shuffled over to the far end of the couch. Rage was twisting through Alexander, and the man wanted nothing more than to continue fighting with his rival in the same manner that the pair usually did during cabinet meetings.

Fuck Thomas Jefferson.

Fuck his stupid hair, stupid eyes, stupid mouth, stupid accent, stupid clothes, stupid good looks...

However, powerful feelings of longing, abandonment, sadness and guilt soon subdued the Federalist’s boiling level of anger, and Alex felt his chest ache with familiar loneliness.

How had he managed to screw up something that was going so well?

Running his hands through his messy locks, Alexander took a few more minutes to breathe deeply and determine what his next course of action would be. He had almost a primal urge to seek out human contact, but obviously speaking to Thomas Jefferson again this evening was out of the question.

Slowly, Alex reached for his phone that he’d placed safely on a nearby table when Thomas had arrived at his apartment and scrolled rapidly through his contacts with the desperate wish to find his best friend’s name.

John Laurens.

Alexander held the phone up to his ear and waited patiently as the sound of repetitive ringing met his ears. Perhaps John was busy and wouldn’t pick up, or maybe he was—

”Yo, Alex! I didn’t expect you to call! How’s date night with Jeffershit going?”

The immigrant breathed an audible sigh of relief that his best friend had picked up and allowed Alex to hear his comforting voice.

”Alex, what’s up?”

”I fucked it up, John. Thomas left and it’s all my fault” Alexander hated how his voice sounded incredibly hollow over the phone, but desperately needed someone to confide in right now.

”Really?? What happened?”

”I don’t know how things went so badly so quickly! One minute we were making out and things started to get heated, and the next he’s telling me that he doesn’t want to have sex with me and that I’m delusional for thinking so”

A brief moment of silence met Alexander’s ears as the man at the other end of the line stayed quiet. Then, John started speaking again and Alex felt a gentle smile begin to spread across his face.

”Fuck it, I’m coming over”

——————————————————

Thomas Jefferson didn’t entirely remember driving back to his own apartment, but couldn’t hide from his emotions when he closed the front door behind him and was finally alone. With his back pressed against the door, the Virginian inaudible slid to the floor, tucked his knees up in front of him in a position that exclusively screamed vulnerability, and buried his head in his hands.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck....

Inhaling deeply, Thomas ran his fingers gentle through his curls and across his scalp in an attempt to calm himself down and control his overpowering and unwanted emotions. His technique worked for a moment, and the man found himself relaxing ever so slightly....before Thomas’ mind reminded him of how only thirty minutes ago, the strong and experienced hands of Alexander Hamilton had been buried within his hair.

Letting his hands fall to the floor at such a thought, Thomas stared blankly across his hallway and felt his chest heave with a multitude of mostly negative emotions; loneliness, desire, shock, pain, sadness...

”Fucking idiot” Thomas whispered to himself, before reaching into his jacket pocket with the automatically wish to speak to the one person who’d remained by his side for longer than Thomas could remember.

The gentle voice of James Madison met his ears after the second phone ring, and Thomas felt himself automatically release an amount of tension at the comforting sound.

”Thomas, everything alright?”

Of course, James would immediately be suspicious and question the reason why the other Virginian was calling him, seeing as Thomas had spent the majority of the day talking animatedly with him about how Alexander Hamilton had invited him over for dinner that evening.

”Not really” Thomas sighed, and James’ tone became more concerned.

”What happened? Where are you? Are you safe?”

Thomas smiled slightly at his best friend’s caring nature, before confirming that he was at his own apartment. After another pause, Thomas felt loneliness stab into his stomach once again, and desperately wished to converse with his best friend in person.

”Jemmy....I know that it’s late, and I completely understand if this is a bad time, but....would you come over?”

Thomas was surprised to hear how timid and vulnerable his voice currently sounded, but felt his heart swell with unexpected happiness at his best friend’s reply.

”I’ll be over in ten minutes.”

———————————————————

”Okay, let me get this straight; you invited Thomas Jefferson over to have dinner and talk, and then you both started making out and touching each other on your couch, and you were both getting into it, and he was making a lot of pleasurable noises, and then you started giving him a hand job, but then he threw you off and decided that he was leaving, so you confronted him, and he told you that you’re delusional for thinking that he wanted to have sex with you?”

Alexander sighed and nodded in confirmation of his best friend’s recap and summary of events.

”Yeah...and then I got mad with him, and he got mad with me and left.”

The duo were sitting on Alex’s bed, seeing as the downstairs couch was currently not the best environment to conduct their deep talk in. Glancing across at his best friend, Alexander couldn’t help but let out a humourless laugh at John’s confused and partially annoyed facial expression as the man lay back against the multitude of pillows that Alex kept on his bed.

”Yo...what’s wrong with that dude?” John said after a moment, shaking his head and making Alexander release an involuntary chuckle.

”I don’t know! He was really into it. But it was like a switch was moved in his brain and he suddenly decided that he found me undesirable and would never even consider sleeping with me...” Alex trailed off, and John immediately knew what his best friend was implying.

”Alexander Hamilton; you are not undesirable. Or bad when it comes to sex, and you know that I can personally confirm this! Man, you’ve literally got the reputation for being non stop both at your desk and in the bedroom.” John stated firmly, but Alex wasn’t reassured.

”You didn’t see the look on his face, John. It was like..like he was horrified with what I was doing. Repulsed by me. Scared, even. You can’t even imagine Thomas Jefferson looking scared, but that’s what he looked like” Alex explained sadly, and John felt his chest ache at the uncommon sight of his best friend feeling so low.

”Alex, you don’t deserve to feel so low about yourself...and especially as a result of that stupid, manipulating, good for nothing, cowardly, southern asshole. You’re twice the man he’ll ever be, not to mention significantly more attractive” John exclaimed, making Alex smile slightly.

”Thanks, John. I just...don’t know what to do now. Should I talk to him? Apologise?”

”Why would you be the one who needs to apologise?!” Laurens exclaimed in disbelief, his eyebrows creasing and freckled face expressing confusion and annoyance.

”What if I misjudged him and his intentions? What if it was actually obvious that he didn’t want me, but I was too oblivious and occupied to notice? What if I accidentally forced him? What if—“ Alexander began, his voice expressing pure doubt and guilt, but John quickly cut off his rhetorical questioning.

”Alex, do you want to hear what I honestly think?” the freckled man asked slowly, and continued speaking when Alex nodded immediately.

”I think that Thomas Jefferson is a complete dick. You know how spiteful and manipulative he can be. Well, have you thought about if he’d planned to make you feel this way? That asshole loves making you doubt yourself every day, and I can see him devising this plan to have you feel inadequate. He’s trying to make you feel insecure.”

”But...that doesn’t make sense. If that’s true, are you saying that he was never actually attracted to me?” Alex asked slowly, and John shook his head firmly.

”Not necessarily. Picture this; you’re Thomas Jefferson, a guy who’s probably been taught to demonstrate his masculinity at every possible time and potentially believes that being attracted to men isn’t right. He is southern, after all” John began, and Alex snorted with a small grin.

”John, are you forgetting that you’re southern too?”

”Excuse me, I don’t meet any social criteria that being from the south entails! Thomas Jefferson, however, is a walking and talking Virginian stereotype; he’s arrogant, rich with family money, pompous, high on his own inflated level of self-esteem, uncaring, delusional, probably been raised to be sexist, homophobic—“ John stated until Alex cut off his ranting with a raised hand.

”Okay, okay! Fair point. Please continue”

“Thank you” John replied, the man grinning before clearing his throat and speaking.

”Now, imagine how vulnerable and disadvantaged a person like Jeffershit feels when he meets you, Alexander Hamilton, and has his opinions, dominance, masculinity and sexuality challenged every day. He knows that he should hate you, and he wants to stay in control, but is simultaneously attracted to you. You get me so far?” John asked, and Alex nodded in confirmation of his understanding.

”So our poor, dear Thomas starts to feel frustrated, annoyed, emotionally torn, etc etc. He thinks about how he can regain control. So, he devises the perfect plan; he would go along with his attraction towards you and ensure that you get the message that he’s interested. Cut to you inviting him over to your house this evening, and Jefferson actively participating in your affections towards him. Now, I’m taking a guess here, but it’s likely that Jefferson would have had the intention of dominating you; he’d wish to re-establish control and raise his self esteem by being in control of you during sex. That way, he’d feel satisfied that the threats against his masculinity and possession of control are subdued, and he wouldn’t have to fear you anymore. You’d be one less thing to worry about.”

”But, I’m sure Jeffershit didn’t anticipate for you to be the dominant one in the bedroom. Therefore, when he realised that he was out of his depth, had no chance of overpowering you, and started to actually enjoy the experience of being at your will, he panicked and tried to recover by making you doubt yourself and feel insecure.” John finished triumphantly, crossing his arms and staring into Alex’s eyes. 

A brief moment of silence established itself between the two friends as Alexander mentally processed all that John had said and suggested.

”You could be right” the Federalist sighed.

”I d’know Alex, but all I’m saying is that Thomas Jefferson’s the sort of person who’d do something like that” John shrugged, before noticing how his best friend still looked unsatisfied.

”Come on, forget about that asshole right now. We can hang out for the rest of the evening!” John suggested as Alex flopped down to lie next to the southerner on his bed.

”I really thought he liked me back..at least for a moment or two. But I guess not” Alexander spoke softly, and John felt his heart ache at the painful tone of the immigrant’s voice.

”Me and Herc can teach him a lesson if you’d like?” John offered lightly, more out of humour than seriousness, and Alexander successfully laughed.

”You know that Herc thinks Jefferson is fine! Herc could take anyone down but would never touch Thomas Jefferson in a million years! He’s always going on about how nice his hair and bone structure is” Alex stated with a laugh, and John shrugged.

”True, but we are your sworn best friends, and would obviously defend you to the death no matter what!”

Alexander continued laughing softly, and John’s heart hammered slightly harder against his rib cage when the smaller man pulled him into a sideways hug.

”Thanks for coming over tonight, John. You’ve really made me feel a bit better. And at least I understand Jeffershit a bit more now, so dealing with him won’t be as difficult from now on”

John smiled softly, resting his forehead gently on top of Alexander’s surprisingly soft locks.

”It’s no problem, Alex. Can’t have you feeling upset because of some asshole” 

——————————————————-

”I’m such an idiot, James!”

”No, you’re not”

”Yes, I am!”

James Madison sighed and took ahold of Thomas Jefferson’s stress-clenched hands. The pair of Virginians had been sitting on Thomas’ couch for the past fifteen minutes, which had been enough time for James to begin piecing together the events and emotions that had caused Thomas to have worked himself into such a state of upset.

”It’s all my fault, Jemmy!” Thomas moaned for what seemed like the hundredth time as his hands were taken into the smaller man’s gentle embrace.

”Okay, take some more deep breaths and we’ll start again from the beginning. So, you like Alexander Hamilton in..that way?” James began, automatically zoning into therapist friend mode and encouraging Thomas to break down his messy thoughts and conflicting emotions.

The taller Virginian met James’ eyes slowly, and the shorter man immediately noticed a slight darkening of Thomas’ cheeks at the question.

”Yeah, Jemmy, I do...if you hadn’t guessed already”

”Surprisingly, I had guessed. One of the reasons for my guess being that you talk about him way too much every day for there to only be hatred between you” James smiled, and Thomas shrugged in agreement with downcast eyes.

”And you wanted to have sex with Hamilton?”

Thomas paused for a moment, before clearing his throat and talking in a tone that James instantly recognised to be false confidence.

”Yes, I did. I hadn’t expected stuff to escalate how and when they did, but...I wanted him” Thomas said softly and shortly, and James could tell that his best friend felt embarrassed about discussing the extensive details of sex and his emotions, especially when they related to Alexander Hamilton.

However, this behaviour wasn’t unusual. Thomas had always been surprisingly quiet whenever the topic of his various crushes had come up over the years, and James honestly thought that it was adorable for such a loudmouthed, outwardly confident and publicly established man to immediately become a blushing and stuttering mess at the hands of his romantic attractions.

”So, what happened? Did you get overwhelmed? Change your mind halfway through?” James asked gently, and Thomas pulled away from James’ touch to run his fingers through his curls absentmindedly.

”James...so you know that I’ve never been with anyone sexually or romantically other than Martha?” Thomas asked, clearly seeking for support and reassurance, and James immediately nodded.

”Well, I just..panicked. As soon as we started kissing, half of my mind cheered and the other half just shut down. Hamilton..he was everywhere. He was moving so fast. I couldn’t...” Thomas trailed off, clearly attempting to organise his muffler thoughts into words, but James held up a hand to pause his rambling.

”Did Hamilton force you to do anything that you didn’t want to do?” he asked seriously, but Thomas shook his head forcefully.

”What? No, God no! It wasn’t like that! He didn’t..I wouldn’t..he didn’t...” Thomas stumbled over his words nervously, and James began to regret his questioning. It was wise to simply let Thomas speak when the man became too stressed or nervous, and verbal interruptions never helped.

The taller Virginian cleared his throat to compose himself and continued after another moment.

”You’re right; I think I did get overwhelmed. Hamilton was..moving very fast, and it all felt new and too much for me. I loved what was happening, but..but I didn’t know how to be enough for him” Thomas stated quietly, and James frowned slightly.

”What do you mean?”

”Well...he’s Alexander Hamilton! His reputation implies that he’s probably had sex with half of the New York population! He’s experienced. He knew exactly what to do, and it would have been obvious that I had no idea what I was doing! How..how was I ever going to be enough for him? What if he’d gotten upset with me? What if he’d laughed at me? What if he’d told everyone that I was bad? What if—“ Thomas laughed slightly hysterically to mask his cracked voice, and James let out a pained sigh before pulling his best friend into a supportive hug. The problem had suddenly become extremely clear to James, and he needed to get through to his overwhelmed companion.

”Thomas, you need to listen to me, okay?” the shorter Virginian spoke.

”You are enough. You are enough for yourself, and for any other person on this planet. Just because you..haven’t had as much sex as certain other people, doesn’t mean that you’d be bad in bed. But, what you need to understand is that whatever Alexander Hamilton thinks of you does not define you. Let’s hypothetically imagine that he would have laughed at you, or thought you were bad; why should his opinion make you feel less worthy about yourself?”

Thomas sighed and ran a hand wearily over his face. The pair sat in silence for a few more minutes.

”I guess you’re right, Jemmy. I just wish that I’d handled my exit more smoothly and hadn’t acted like an asshole when I panicked. Hamilton definitely didn’t deserve that...”

”Hey, there’s no point worrying about that now. Fortunately or unfortunately, you’ll be seeing Hamilton at work tomorrow and will have plenty of opportunities to speak with him honestly about what happened. He clearly likes you back, and I’m sure he won’t be stupid enough to refuse or misunderstand your explanation. You know that I don’t like the man, but I want you to be happy, and if you like Hamilton then go and make up with him”

The Virginians spoke together for another hour about the situation and other topics of interest, with Thomas significantly more relaxed than he had been straight after arriving home from Hamilton’s apartment. After Thomas thanked his best friend profusely for his support and advise, James left at around midnight, and the taller Virginian was once again alone with only the company of his own thoughts.

In an attempt to prevent his nervousness from bombarding his mind with unwanted thoughts, Thomas decided to try and get some sleep before work in the morning. His open bedroom window allowed the continuous murmur of New York City to gently meet his ears, and although the sound usually made Thomas reminiscent of the comforting and silent nights present in Virginia, the sounds of the City surprisingly helped to relax the man. 

He needed to listen to James. Everything was going to be alright if he explained himself. This wasn’t his fault. He’d be able to find the right words to say tomorrow.

As his eyes grew heavy and fluttered closed, Thomas’ final thought was that maybe Alexander Hamilton was listening to New York City that night too.

————————————————————-

Surprisingly, Alex had fallen asleep before his usual time of 3 A.M, most likely due to the emotionally exhausting evening, and lay deeply asleep on his bed. The immigrant’s mouth was hanging slightly open, and a soft snore emanated from his chest, which only made John Laurens suppress his laughter at the sight and sound.

Alexander and John always stayed over at each other’s apartments when either man came over for the evening, and John saw no logical reason for leaving until the early hours of morning before work commenced. Presently, the freckled man found himself lying wide awake next to his best friend’s sleeping form with his mind refusing to relax. 

After the topic of Thomas Jefferson had been thoroughly discussed, John had successfully managed to cheer up Alex before he’d passed out for exhaustion, but the southerner couldn’t get their earlier subject of conversation out of his head...

Alex didn’t deserve to be mistreated by someone like Jefferson, and John felt his stomach clench in anger at the thought of the Virginian smirking in satisfaction at Alexander’s pain.

However, John wasn’t able to lie to himself and pretend that he didn’t also feel jealousy pumping through his veins.

Alright, Alexander and him had never been an official couple, and had both agreed that they’d be better off as best friends rather than lovers or boyfriends. But, despite it having been years now since the pair last had sex together, John still felt an ache in his heart when he though of all that was no more.

Fucking Jefferson. Why did Alexander have to be attracted to someone so horrible? There were plenty other people who would be so much better for him than Thomas Jefferson, and John mentally included himself in that category. Alex deserved so much more than anything Jefferson could give him. Why was Alex willing to sleep with Jeffershit instead of someone like John himself? 

Woah. Okay, where did that thought come from? John immediately halted that dangerous idea. No, Alexander and him were better off as friends. They’d previously tried to coordinate a relationship, and it hadn’t worked. That was the end of it. There was no use in bringing up old emotions when Alex had clearly and completely moved on with his life.

Sighing deeply, John lay motionless on Alex’s bed for another few minutes, before his eyes opened once again. Remembering that Alexander would naturally have forgotten to set his work phone alarm clock, John reached across and found his best friend’s phone, unlocking it (obviously John and Alex shared their phone passwords with each other, duh!) and squinted at the bright screen.

It took John only a moment to turn on Alex’s alarm clock, but his eyes remained glued to the screen. Absently glancing at Alex’s texts, John saw that Thomas Jefferson had refrained from texting Alex after he’d left earlier that evening, and John felt his heart begin to fill with rage once again.

Nothing? No explanation? Not even a one word apology? Fucking dickhead.

John knew that he should stop himself from invading Alex’s privacy, but found his fingers automatically typing out an angry and aggressive text addressed to Jefferson. It was only when John remembered that Alex had decided that avoiding Jefferson should be the next step, did John reluctantly delete the draft.

Resigning to simply place the phone down without further intrusions, John reached across to place Alex’s phone on the bedside table, but accidentally loosened his grip on the device and felt his fingers slip down the electronic screen.

Pulling the phone towards him once more to adjust his grip, John lifted his fingers to find the ‘off’ button, but froze when his eyes absently lingered on the screen.

John had accidentally swiped upwards to view another part of Alexander’s conversation with Jefferson, and the freckled man felt his heart clench when he saw more of exactly what the two men had been sending each other.

A partially naked photo of Alexander himself was displayed in the chat, with the Federalist grinning cheekily up at the camera. John immediately noticed how Alex had positioned the photo so his private parts were only just out of the shot. The caption underneath the photo said ‘what’s up, Jefferson?’

John found himself staring at the photo for what seemed like hours, as jealousy and pain blossomed in his chest all over again. Alex had never sent John any photos like this when they were together. Why had Alex felt he could send Thomas Jefferson such a photo? The guy was an asshole!

Putting any guilty thoughts out of his mind, John scrolled down in the chat and saw with a jolt that Jefferson had replied with a similar image.

The man was laying down fully naked on what John presumed to be his bed (who else would have such obviously expensive sheets?), and a stifled breath trapped itself in John’s throat when he observed how Jefferson had apparently taken Alex’s intimate photo as a personal challenge; Thomas had his hand wrapped around his dick in full view of the camera, and wore a smirk with the photo captioned “plenty, Hamilton” with a winking face added on the end.

Staring at the photo with a mixture of disgust, jealousy and awe (although John would never admit it, Jefferson had a nice body, like hot damn), John decided that he’d seen enough and desired to burn both the photos of Alex and Jefferson permanently out of his mind.

However, the man paused momentarily as a smirk spread across his freckled face as an idea hit him.

Jefferson would be horrified if anyone other than Alex ever observed that personal photo of him touching himself.

John felt his grin widen as he imagined the furious expression plastered over Thomas Jefferson’s stupid face if his nudes were ever leaked.

That asshole would surely feel embarrassed...and maybe finally understand that you can’t just go around leading people on if you don’t plan on actually having sex with them.

John was known for his impulsivity, and found himself saving the photo of Jefferson before giving his intentions a second thought; Jeffershit had hurt Alexander, and obviously deserved to suffer the consequences of messing with John’s best friend.

Besides, he was sure Alex would find the idea hilarious, and the thought of his best friend laughing in the face of the man who’d stood him up only spurred John onwards.

Alexander’s phone contact list revealed an extensive amount of people who John knew that Jefferson was connected to, the majority of them being work colleagues. The man felt his heart leap with adrenaline as he began to select individuals to send Thomas’ photo to.

Angelica Schuyler

John Adams

Eliza Schuyler

Samuel Seabury

Peggy Schuyler

Hercules Mulligan

James Reynolds

Aaron Burr

Benjamin Franklin

Charles Lee

In total, John selected around twenty people who definitely knew Jefferson, and found himself silently laughing as he selected his last few people; James Madison and Lafayette. Jeffershit’s best friend and french companion would be especially affected by the unexpected nude photo, and John’s chest shook with laughter as he pressed the ‘Send’ button with almost no hesitation. The phone was then placed back innocently on Alex’s bedside table as if nothing had happened.

Lying back down next to Alexander’s sleeping form, John grinned into the darkness and couldn’t wait to see Alex’s reaction in the morning.

———————————————————-

Alexander was awoken from a deep sleep hours later, and immediately assumed that his morning alarm had been the cause of his slumber being disturbed.

Groaning and squinting his eyes open against the bright morning light, Alex blindly reached in the vague direction of his bedside table, and managed to pick up his vibrating phone. Pulling the device in front of his face, Alex clicked the screen repeatedly in an attempt to subdue his alarm and grant himself another ten minutes in bed.

However, the repetitive sounds and vibrations emanating from his phone refrained from ending, and Alex blearily opened his eyes with a growing frown displayed over his face.

It took Alexander’s eyes a moment of rapid blinking to allow himself to adjust to the brightness of his screen, but soon saw with surprise that his phone was blowing up with texts.

Angelica Schuyler: “Alexander What The Fuck”

Hercules Mulligan: “HAHAHAHAHAHHA”

Eliza Schuyler: “um, Alex?”

Peggy Schuyler: “OMG he’s hot!” 

Aaron Burr: “Alexander...”

James Madison: “How Dare You.” 

Samuel Seabury: “why did you send this to me?

John Adams: “Nice pic” 

Lafayette: “Mon ami...pourquoi?” 

James Reynolds: “Always knew he was a fag” 

Charles Lee: “PFFFFFTTTT DICKHEAD” 

Unsurprisingly, Alexander was incredibly confused and sat up in bed, immediately wide awake and frowning.

Everything became more clear upon opening his phone.

Alex’s widened eyes immediately focused upon a familiar photo of none other than Thomas Jefferson in a state of undress. It took the Federalist a moment to realise that this was the same intimate photo that the Virginian had sent to Hamilton last week...

Somehow, the photo that Thomas had sent him been forwarded to a handful of people in his contacts.

From his own phone. 

Immediately feeling his stomach plummet with horror and disbelief, Alex cursed and began scrolling through all his incoming messages.

How had this happened?

He didn’t remember doing this!

Had he been drinking last night?

Oh god...

A familiar laugh sounded from nearby, and John Laurens appeared next to Alex, the man yawning loudly and stretching dynamically.

”Yo everyone’s seen the photo? I can’t wait to see the look on Jeffershit’s face!” John chuckled, and Alex heard the usually warming and comforting sound as if he were stuck underwater; the truth hit Alexander like a tidal wave and made the whole world appear muffled and distorted for a moment.

John Laurens, his best friend and companion, had sent out the photo.

”Alex?” the freckled man asked when he made another joke at Jefferson’s expense and Alexander refrained from responding.

Twisting his body to face the other man head on, Alex stared at John in pure disbelief, his mouth slightly open with shock, eyes connecting deeply with his best friend’s confused gaze.

”What have you done?” immigrant asked quietly, his voice devoid of all emotion.

John opened his mouth to respond, but Alex cut him off. The harsh reality of the situation was making his brain speed up to its normal non-stop setting, and waves of emotions and thoughts were assaulting Alex’s mind.

”What the fuck, John?! How could you send that out?” Alex cried, the unexpected noise and display of emotion causing John to flinch slightly; the boyish grin vanished from his face at the amount of anger lacing his best friend’s words.

”Alex, chill!”

”Why the fuck did you do that?” Alexander demanded, his fists shaking with rage and knuckles turning white. His phone was still clutched in his hand, cheerily displaying Thomas’ photo in an almost mocking fashion.

”It was a joke! Jefferson was an asshole to you, and I thought that you’d find it funny to get some payback!” John explained hurriedly, raising his hands up as if in a surrender to Alex’s rage.

”That doesn’t mean he deserved to have his nudes leaked!”

”Oh, I’m sorry about hurting poor Thomas’ feelings. Maybe he should have thought twice before sending out a photo of himself jerking off” John said bitterly, his tone remarkably cold and unlike his usual cheerful quality.

”Oh my god” Alexander cried, throwing his face into his hands and suppressing the urge to scream with anguish.

The photo of Thomas would be rapidly circulating the internet right now.

There was no way easy of stopping it from spreading.

Alex had read articles about how people’s nudes being leaked had caused their lives to be ruined.

Everyone at work had either already seen the photo, or would be shown it in the near future.

What if the photo reached the Press?

John had sent the photo to James Madison, which...oh god...meant that Thomas would have found out about the photo being leaked from none other than Alex’s phone.

Thomas...

Opening his burning eyes and lifting his head up slowly from his palms, Alex’s gaze met with John. The man looked very wary, and had positioned himself slightly further away from Alexander on the bed, his hands nervously wringing themselves in his lap.

The freckled man looked distinctly like a naughty child who’d just been caught disobeying his father and was anticipating the punishment.

”You had no right to go through my phone, let alone send out that photo” Alex spoke coldly, and the tense silence within the room was so clear it could almost have been seen.

“I can’t believe you. What were you thinking? Are you insane? You actually thought that leaking Jefferson’s nudes was a good idea? Jefferson..can be an asshole, but nobody deserves to have their life ruined! Everyone will see the photo, John, including the newspapers! Thomas is a person, and he’s in the public eye, and people who hate him will have a field day with that photo being leaked!” Alex shouted, his words becoming more frantically spoken as his verbal explosion continued.

Yet, Alex forced himself to stop speaking; he didn’t have the time to continue yelling at his best friend and waste more time. 

Launching himself off the bed, Alexander hurried over to his wardrobe and began pulling clothes off various hangers almost as fast as his hands moved when holding a pen. John stared silently as the shorter man sprinted into the bathroom to change; Alex needed to get into work as soon as possible and attempt to diffuse the situation...and explain himself to Thomas Jefferson.

————————————————————

Twenty minutes later, Alexander pulled up outside of Washington office buildings alone; John had mumbled something about how he needed to get home and change his clothes before work.

Rubbing his hands stressfully over his face, Alex let out a deep sigh. Ultimately, he knew that John hadn’t meant to upset Alex or cause any irreversible damage. But his best friend seemed to always act so impulsively and childishly, and this time there was no stopping the damage from spreading and affecting other people.

As Alex had expected, the photo had already spread around work. Eyes raised to stare at him as soon as the man pushed open the building’s front doors, dozens of pupils visually assaulting him and communicating countless different messages and reactions.

Individuals stopped and stared at him in clear disgust, while others smirked and raised their eyebrows suggestively. A gossiping huddle of young female interns giggled and whispered as Alex passed by, and the immigrant soon spotted the unwelcoming figures of John Adams, Charles Lee and James Reynolds grinning in his direction as he walked briskly forwards down the entrance’s corridor.

“Oi Hamilton, have fun with Jefferson last night?”

”That picture was something! Who knew Jeffershit was such a little gay slut!” 

”Which one of you took it up the arse? You’d be the obvious guess, but I’d bet on closeted Jefferson having a thing for anal—“ 

Anxiety and adrenaline roared in Alexander’s ears as he strode past the continuous jeering, his mind focused on making it to Thomas’ office.

He had to explain himself to Jefferson. The man hadn’t deserved this, despite what had happened between the pair the previous night. Alexander knew that he’d never leak anyone’s nudes, and Thomas had to know that...

Immediately upon reaching the Virginian’s closed office door, Alex attempted to enter the office but was stopped when he realised that Thomas’ door was locked from the inside.

Well, at least he knew that Thomas was here.

Without any hesitation, Alexander drew back his fist and began knocking repeatedly upon the wood. His banging increased when only silence met his ears, and Alex’s rising levels of desperation caused him to call out in between knocks.

”Jefferson? Jefferson, it’s me! Open up, I need to talk to you! I know you’re in there, please open the door. Thomas? I need to talk to you! Thomas, open the door—“

The office door was flung open dynamically and so unexpectedly that Alex stumbled back slightly. The immigrant’s stomach plummeted with dread at the sight of a furious James Madison standing in the doorframe.

The man was around the same height as Alexander and usually expressed anything but intimidation, but Alex was taken aback by the man’s sudden change in physicality and aura. Madison was shaking slightly, his hands bawled into fists at his sides, and his expression of complete fury made Alex think that maybe it hadn’t been such a good idea to approach Thomas’ office after all...

”What the hell do you want, Hamilton?” Madison hissed, his words forced out brokenly as if the man was having difficulty controlling himself.

”I need to speak with Th—Jefferson” Alex said firmly, but James made no attempt to move out of Alexander’s way. 

”You’ve got some nerve, coming here and acting as if you’ve got some unspoken right to speak with the person you’ve just humiliated. How did it make you feel, when you released that photo? Were you satisfied that you’d won and finally beaten your political rival? You’re pathetic. Did you even bother to think about how much real damage you were about to cause before you clicked send? I’m sure you’re loving this. You’re a fucking sociopath. Get the hell out of my sight.” James snarled, and Alex had never seen anyone so empowered with fury in the defensive of someone else.

The sight was almost paralysing, but Alex knew that he had to proclaim his innocence.

”Madison, let me in. I need to speak with him” Alexander stated, holding his ground as the shorter Virginian let out a humourless bark of laughter.

”Nothing you have to say could possibly make this situation alright. Come to redeem yourself? Beg for forgiveness? Or do you just want to brag? Come to enlighten us about how sending nudes can ruin a person’s life, or laugh about how you should ‘be careful about what you post online’?” James sneered.

However, just as Alex opened his mouth to retort and begin proclaiming his innocence, another person spoke from within the office that James was currently guarding.

“Jemmy, it’s okay. He..he can come in”


	2. Chapter 2

“Jemmy, it’s okay. He..he can come in”

Alexander felt his chest clench at how familiar but different the man’s voice sounded; he’d never heard Thomas Jefferson sound so empty. All usual tones of arrogance and confidence had vanished, and Alex subtly took a deep breath before pushing past James Madison and into his rival’s office.

A man who resembled Thomas Jefferson came into view, but surely had to be a lookalike of the Virginian. The almost unrecognisable figure lifted his gaze to meet Alex’s stare as the Federalist stood in the office doorway.

Thomas Jefferson’s hair was usually perfectly groomed and flawlessly styled, and his locks were secretly admired/envied by practically everyone within the cabinet.

Yet right now, the man’s curls were sticking up in random directions as if his hands had been stressfully and repeatedly been brushed through them.

Thomas Jefferson’s attire normally consisted of an immaculately pressed vibrant suit that hugged his figure gorgeously. Not that Alexander ever stared at his rival’s body for prolonged periods of time, obviously.

Today, however, the Virginian was wearing a simple (and reasonably crumpled) shirt with trousers, as if the man had literally just thrown on the first outfit he’d spotted that morning.

Thomas Jefferson’s posture usually screamed confidence and self-assurance layered with elegant arrogance, which was observable in the slight sway of the man’s hips when the Virginian walked, or when Jefferson leaned casually against a wall or back in his seat with his hands behind his head, or when the man simply moved at all.

Yet, the man’s now slumped shoulders, clasped hands and tense body language only communicated barely hidden nervousness and exhaustion.

But what made Alexander’s chest clench most strongly with shock and guilt was the current state of his rival’s eyes. He’d noticed how Thomas Jefferson’s pupils were extremely expressive and were able to communicate exactly how the man was feeling; the Virginian’s eyes usually shone with arrogance to enhance his familiar smirk, or gleamed with annoyance when confronting Alexander, or lit with happiness when speaking with James Madison. Alex never found himself willing to look away from the display.

Alexander had never seen Thomas Jefferson’s eyes express such an amount of pain. The subtle but evident swelling and redness of his pupils immediately told Alexander that the Virginian had been crying.

The famous, spiteful, cocky, brutal and seemingly untouchable Thomas Jefferson had been crying. That didn’t seem like something which could be possible.

The man in front of Alexander was a version of his rival that the immigrant had never encountered before, and a sight that Alex didn’t think existed. He’d always assumed that Thomas Jefferson was immune to raw pain, and the sight in front of him right now genuinely scared Alexander.

The private photo being leaked from his phone had caused Thomas Jefferson to lose all elements of his usual persona and transform into an almost unrecognisable version of himself. Alexander was staring at a glimpse of the real Thomas Jefferson when his arrogantly confident facade was stripped from him.

And the man was in pain because of him.

”Hey—“ Alexander forced his throat to begin forming audible words through his shock, but the Virginian immediately cut him off.

”You can save it”

”...What?”

”Your explanation. You can save it” Thomas stated, clearing his throat as if the man hoped his voice wouldn’t sound so empty and unrecognisable. The Virginian narrowed his eyes in a hard stare before continuing.

”I know why you sent out the photo. You’re mad at me because..because of what happened last night. You don’t like being undermined, or embarrassed, or defied. You can’t let anyone have any control over your life, and god forbid if the brilliant Alexander Hamilton doesn’t get his own way. So yeah, I know why you sent out the photo. You’ve had your revenge. Was it worth it? Are you finally satisfied?”

Thomas’ voice broke despite his angry glare, and the man stopped speaking with a slight shake of his head. The Virginian looked as if he were trying his hardest not to start crying again, and the terrifying sight spurred Alexander into speaking, his words blurting themselves out from his mouth in a frenzied rush.

”I didn’t send out the photo”

Silence settled tensely within the office as the rivals held eye contact and Alexander’s words had time to be processed, until a harsh laugh echoed from the doorway.

”You expect anyone to believe that?” James Madison hissed, and Alex forced himself to continue speaking; the Federalist had completely forgotten about the other Virginian’s presence, but wasn’t going to let that stop him from explaining himself.

”I’m telling the truth! I didn’t send out that photo of you” he spoke directly to the silent Jefferson, the man trying not to sound too desperate but still praying for Thomas to believe him.

”Well, Hamilton, if you didn’t send out the photo, who did?” Madison commented coldly when Jefferson failed to respond after a few seconds.

”You were the only person I sent it to” Thomas spoke quietly, and the taller Virginian’s painfully subdued voice spurred Alexander into continuing his explanation.

”After you left my place, John came over—“ Alex began, but the shorter Virginian interrupted him again.

”Adams or Laurens?”

”Laurens” Alex closed his eyes and took a deep breath; he longed to be alone with Thomas Jefferson to personally and thoroughly explain himself in private, but he knew that asking James Madison to leave wouldn’t end well in a million years, and Thomas clearly wanted his best friend with him right now.

”John came over, and we hung out for a while—“

”Oh yeah, I’m sure you two spent the evening bitching about how horrible Thomas had been to you—“ James commented, but Alex was rapidly losing his patience and spoke over the other Virginian’s angry comments.

”—and he ended up spending the night. But not to have sex or anything, it wasn’t like that, we’re just friends y’know..” Alexander rambled slightly in his nervousness, but immediately cut himself off at the sight of Thomas raising his head to stare at him as James let out an audible sigh from the doorway.

“Anyway...while I was asleep, John...he..ah, decided to go through my phone, and found the photos that we’d sent to each other. He then thought it would be...somewhat hilarious to send that photo of you out, mainly because he thought that I’d find it funny—“

”Well, I bet you two children had a great laugh—“

”Madison, can you shut the hell up? I’m not talking to you!” Alexander snapped as his patience crumbled, and instantly found himself face to face with the shorter Virginian.

”Believe me, Hamilton, you found yourself talking to me the minute you decided to fuck over my best friend”

Alex tore his eyes away from Madison’s glare to reconnect his gaze with Jefferson’s empty stare.

”I didn’t send out the photo. I wouldn’t never do something like that to anyone, and I can’t believe that my best friend would just...”Alex trailed off, staring at the Virginian sitting at the desk and purposely ignoring the one furiously invading his personal space.

A moment of silence held itself in the office, and anticipation grew between the three men. Both Alex and James continued their standoff while silently waiting for Thomas to verbally express his thoughts on the matter before reacting accordingly.

Said Virginian remained sitting at his desk motionlessly, his eyes downcast and flooded with various different emotions; it was clear to see that Thomas Jefferson was processing all that Alexander had just told him. 

After another pause, the man let out a small sigh and ran his fingers through his hair again, which only succeeded in increasing Alex’s level of dread. The immigrant couldn’t predict how his rival was reacting to the knowledge of Alexander’s innocence, and there was only a very small chance that Jefferson would accept Alex’s explanation and immediately dispel any negative feelings towards the shorter man. 

After all, their intimate encounter the previous night hadn’t exactly ended peacefully, and Alexander was still partly to blame for the photo being sent out; he’d essentially given John the freedom to go through his phone, and the freckled man had published Thomas’ nudes after the best friends had spent the evening talking extensive amounts of shit about the Virginian. 

The entire situation was a complete mess, and it scared Alexander to know that he might not be able to make things right, especially with Thomas Jefferson. 

“Look..I can’t talk about this right now” 

Thomas’ words snapped Alex out of his own thoughts and the Federalist’s level of guilt only rose.

“Why not?” 

“He doesn’t owe you any explanation” James snapped, the man having moved to lean against the office wall, likely to be subtly closer to Thomas while still being in reach of Alexander.

“I just...well, the morning cabinet meeting is supposed to start in five minutes, and I don’t fancy making Washington hate me any more than he already does. And I..need to think” Thomas spoke shortly, before the man stood up and walked straight past Alex and out of his office. 

James Madison immediately bid Alexander farewell by casting another glare in his direction before the shorter man caught up with his best friend. Leaving Jefferson’s office and glancing down the corridor at the retreating Virginians, Alexander noticed how Thomas Jefferson had immediately rectified his physicality to resemble his usual confident swagger; the man moved with purpose, his head held up high as if his naked photos weren’t currently spreading like the plague within the entire cabinet. 

The physical facade that Jefferson composed in a matter of seconds made Alexander wonder how often the man’s arrogance and confidence was faked, and how did he get so good at hiding his true feelings so convincingly?

Sighing, Alex began making his own way towards the cabinet meeting room, his own feet weighed down with guilt and hopelessness. His thoughts should have been strictly on the upcoming content that was to be discussed within the meeting, but the Federalist knew that Thomas Jefferson would be the only subject on his mind no matter how important or interesting the meeting would be. 

————————————————————

The cabinet meeting, in Alexander’s eyes, probably couldn’t have gone worse. 

“It has come to my attention that a certain inappropriate photo has been circulating online this morning” Washington opened the cabinet meeting by immediately addressing the situation, and whispers instantly broke out within the cabinet.

Multiple glances from many cabinet members were thrown towards both Alexander and Thomas, but both men resigned themselves to staying silent as Washington continued. Alex forced himself to breathe normally, and he noticed how Thomas’ body tensed slightly. 

“I would like to remind you all that private and personal matters should remain outside of the office. Sharing inappropriate material can be extremely serious, as well as being a distraction from more important matters such as the content of the speeches we are about to hear” 

Washington’s brief announcement was probably in an attempt to subdue the amount of gossip the photo had created, but only succeeded in reminding all members present of the scandalous situation that the Secretaries of State and Treasury were current in. Washington refrained from glancing over at either man during his talk, but Alex knew that the President was likely to speak with both Secretaries later that day. 

The Federalist was secretly glad that he wasn’t scheduled to present any of his ideas during the meeting, and was supposed to spend the hour analysing the speaking cabinet members’ proposals and offering his opinions when necessary. Drawing unnecessary attention to himself surely wouldn’t help the current situation. 

However, despite Washington’s introductory announcement, every cabinet member appeared to be distracted throughout the majority of the meeting, and Alex found it impossible to concentrate even if he’d wanted to. The background sound of whispered comments and barely stifled laughter accompanied every presented speech, and it became clear that there was only one subject of interest on the cabinet audience’s mind that morning. 

Despite his attempts to block out the continuous gossiping, Alexander found himself assaulted with whispered questioning comments that somehow escaped Washington’s ear.

“Isn’t Hamilton bisexual?” 

“I thought he was straight!” 

“I wonder who tops and who bottoms”

“Do you think they have hate sex in their offices after every cabinet battle?” 

“Why did he send out that photo?” 

However, the majority of hissed gossip heavily concerned Thomas Jefferson, along with his sexual orientation, apparent relationship with Alex himself, and his scandalous nudes. 

“From the photo, how many inches long do you reckon his dick is?” 

“What’s Jefferson’s number? I wouldn’t mind being sent some more photos”

“A closeted Virginian Republican? What a scandal!” 

“Imagine what it’d be like sleeping with him!” 

“I bet on Jefferson being the girl in the relationship. He dresses in pink, after all”

“Never knew a Virginian who likes taking dick” 

“Bet his accent sounds even more stupid when he’s moaning Hamilton’s name” 

The man in question, who would normally be one to verbally respond to any gossip concerning him, uncharacteristically kept his mouth shut throughout the entire meeting. Despite obviously being able to hear all that was being said, Jefferson held his head down while his hand never ceased taking written notes on the speeches being presented.

Thomas appeared to be intently focused upon his writing, but Alex knew the man would be just as distracted as he was, and that Jefferson was trying to throw himself into his work in an attempt to block out the surrounding gossip.

“Hey Jefferson, what’s it like to take Hamilton’s dick? People seem to think that you’re the one doing him, but you don’t fool me. You take him in your tight Virginian ass, or your mouth? Hamilton does always say how much he wishes you’d just shut up” Alex heard the audible whisper of John Adams from across the room as the man leered towards the silent Virginian. 

“What? You’ve gone all modest now after we’ve all seen that photo? No need to be shy!” the man continued when Thomas ignored the comments, grinning at the laughter that sounded from many cabinet members who were now intently watching the one-sided conversation. 

Washington wasn’t oblivious to the disturbance within his onlooking cabinet members, and sternly told all to keep it down and “show respect” to those presenting their speeches. 

However, as soon as the President’s attention focused away from the murmuring, multiple cabinet members resumed their taunting of Thomas Jefferson in low voices. Alex felt a frown growing on his face as he witnessed John Adams and his cronies continue their one sided mockery without bothering to even hide their whisperings. 

James Madison began responding with his own defensive whispers when his best friend still wasn’t left alone, but the situation only got worse when one of Adams’ friends began imitating Thomas moaning (“Ohhh A..Alex! Alexander! Ohh yes, yes!) and mimed taking a nude photo, which caused an increase of cruel laughter within the cabinet as the nature of the joke became obvious to anyone watching. 

Alexander vaguely heard Washington’s booming voice ringing out within the cabinet in response to the laughter, but all his focus was upon his rival. 

At a glance, one would observe how Thomas Jefferson appeared to completely ignoring the comments, but Alex felt his heart clench with a mixture of guilt and anger as he noticed how Jefferson was clutching his pen extremely tightly in an attempt to prevent himself from shaking. 

Without thinking, Alex found himself standing up from his seat and opening his mouth to address the entire cabinet, his anger turning cold as the man found all the right words to say in his verbal attack. All eyes turned towards the Federalist in surprise, but Alexander could only see the scared and vulnerable expression that Thomas Jefferson had worn the previous night flash before his eyes. 

“You know, it’s almost like everyone here has never seen a naked photo before. Well, surprise! Thomas Jefferson has a dick, and I’ve got a dick. But I don’t believe that it’s anyone’s business to know about anyone’s relationships or sexuality, and I can only imagine how sad all your lives must be if a naked photo is all that’s relevant and interesting to discuss right now” 

“Secretary Hamilton” Washington spoke in a warning tone, but his voice was drowned out by the cabinet bursting into conversation in response to Alex words. The Federalist felt himself spurred on to continue speaking.

“I actually didn’t send out that photo deliberately. It was a mistake. It wasn’t to intentionally embarrass anyone, or to expose any ‘secret relationship’. Once again, I fucked up. But what else is new? ” 

“Hamilton” Washington’s voice had definitely adopted a dangerous tone now, but Alex couldn’t stop himself from speaking, especially when he saw the amusement glinting within John Adams’ eyes.

“Oh, and Adams? I doubt my dick would be big enough to shut your mouth up, so why don’t you go back to stuffing your face with desserts, or do you need me to challenge you to a duel and put a bullet in your mouth?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heya so thanks for reading, there’ll probs be just one more chapter after this one xx


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the final chapter was getting very long so i’ve split it into two lmao. the last chapter will be coming soon, hope you enjoy reading x

Unsurprisingly, Alexander’s outburst escalated the cabinet meeting entirely. 

Noise erupted as around half of the cabinet began animatedly gossiping about what the Secretary of Treasury has just stated, while the other half dynamically spectated as the figures of John Adams and Alexander Hamilton continued verbally hurling insults at each other from across the room.

It was impossible for any of the scheduled speeches to continue being presented, especially seeing as Washington was forced to physically separate the men when Alexander jumped over his desk to square up with Adams. 

Once Washington had finally managed to shout the cabinet into reducing the room’s volume to an acceptable level, the President rubbed his hands over his face in clear exhaustion and despair. All attention focused on the man, while Alex continued to breathe heavily and glare daggers at John Adams. 

”Cabinet is dismissed for today. We shall continue discussing this morning’s topics of interest at a later date, when you’ve all remembered how to acceptably behave as members of our government” the President spoke softly, his deadly quiet tone one that nobody wise would wish to test.

Everyone began gathering up their belongings and moving towards the exit as quickly as possible, nobody willing to witness the climax of Washington’s wrath. The gossiping, however, failed to cease, and only succeeded in increasing the scowl worn by Alexander Hamilton. Still fuming with anger and adrenaline, the man roughly threw his notes into his bag before dragging himself in the direction of the door alongside his peers.

All Alex wanted to do right now was collapse in his office to mentally organise himself and re-evaluate his actions, before deciding upon what he should do next. He didn’t know if his cabinet outburst had been wise, seeing as Alex sometimes let his anger take control over his mouth. Yet, he couldn’t stand listening to the never ending gossiping of his ignorant and spiteful coworkers, and felt that speaking his mind was the only appropriate thing he could have done in the moment. 

However, the Federalist felt pressure upon his shoulder as he reached the cabinet room door, and turned to see the President’s large palm occupying space on his emerald clad suit, effectively pausing Alexander’s movements and dynamic train of thought.

”Secretary Hamilton, please remain behind” Washington instructed lowly, the man’s tone unintentionally hinting to Alexander that they had plenty to discuss.

Turning completely around, Alex sighed deeply and moved further into the room’s centre, before his gaze happen to glance over at Thomas Jefferson for the first time since his recent outburst. The taller man was still stationed at his desk, and Alex felt something tighten in his chest as he realised that his rival hadn’t moved since Washington had dismissed the cabinet.

”Secretary Jefferson, please stay too” Washington added as the room continued to empty and the nature of his upcoming conversation became blatantly obvious.

Jefferson wore a strangely blank expression on his face as he stood up to receive Washington’s upcoming lecture (no doubt), and Alex realised with a jolt that he had no idea how Jefferson felt about what he’d just publicly shouted at practically all of their coworkers.

Once all other cabinet members had vacated the room, James Madison glancing slightly worriedly at his best friend before closing the door behind him, Washington lifted his head from his hands to stare at the two Secretaries before him.

Silence tensed between the three men for a moment before the President broke it with a deep sigh.

”Was that outburst really necessary, Secretary Hamilton?” Washington spoke tiredly, and Alex immediately resumed his defence position.

”Sir, I wasn’t about to just sit there while the entire cabinet blatantly gossiped and asked inappropriately personal questions! You were there, you knew that nobody was listening to the speeches anyway, so why—“ the shorter man ranted, until Washington spoke over him.

”That’s no excuse to commence a verbal assault that almost turned physical, Alexander... but anyway, that’s not the primary reason for why I wanted to speak with you both” the President began, and both Secretaries remained silent in preparation for their boss’ upcoming speech. 

“After being made aware of the...inappropriate photo of Secretary Jefferson circulating online this morning, I made a few calls in regards to reducing the spread of the photo and taking it off social media immediately” Washington began, and Alex noticed how Thomas instantly tense at the mention of the photo.

”The people I instructed with this task are highly skilled in these sorts of...personal matters, and thankfully managed to remove a significant amount of reposted photos of the original image. I’ve been told that the photo has been flagged and is to be quickly removed from any accounts who share or post the image from now on”

Alexander almost managed to relax at this knowledge, but Thomas shook his head slightly before addressing Washington.

”But?”

Washington let out a deep sigh before replying, his gaze connecting with the younger man’s and an expression of pity spread across his facial features.

”Unfortunately, I’ve been told that a number of copies of the photo were sent to various different newspapers before my people were able to intervene. I shall be personally contacting said newspapers shortly to see if they can be persuaded not to publish the material. However, it can be expected that articles about and including the photo will be released, seeing as ‘Freedom of the Press’ is highly valued and commonly used to justify the publication of personal information regarding individuals in the public eye”

A moment of silence settled in the cabinet room at Washington’s words. Thomas looked like he was trying to keep all internal emotions hidden from showing on his face in front of the President, but it was obvious that the man was nearing a breakdown.

Alexander felt sick at the thought of anyone in the county being able to pick up a newspaper that had a photo Thomas Jefferson intimately naked displayed on the front page. The photo Thomas had sent him had been private, and only for Alexander to see. The Virginian hadn’t taken that photo and automatically consented for the entire United States population to view it.

Fuck. This situation was only getting worse, and Alexander didn’t know if there was anything he could do to help...or if the overwhelming amount of guilt he was currently experiencing would ever lessen.

”Secretary Hamilton” Washington’s address quickly brought Alexander out of his own spiralling thoughts, and the younger man noticed how his boss was staring at him with a somewhat hard expression, enhanced by the man’s controlled frown and crossing of his arms.

”As I’m sure you’re aware, this entire situation could have been avoided if you hadn’t decided to send out the photo in the first place” Washington began, and Alex immediately felt his heart rate increase with adrenaline and anxiety as he opened his mouth to proclaim his innocence once again.

”Sir, as I said earlier, I didn’t sent out the photo!“

”Well then, which individual is responsible for going through your phone and deciding it would be a good idea to leak such an image?” Washington asked, the man closing his eyes in exhaustion and no doubt wondering how he ended up having to deal with such a situation.

Alex opened his mouth as if to reply, but uncharacteristically held his tongue. It was true that John had epically fucked up by sending out the photo from his phone, but the man was still Alexander’s best friend. It had been a mistake and a severe lapse of judgement, but Alex has no wish to get John into any official trouble.

The Federalist noticed how both Washington and Thomas Jefferson were watching him, and hastily answered.

”I..got hacked”

”You got hacked?” Washington repeated slowly, clearly unconvinced as he raised his eyebrows. Jefferson remained staring at Alexander, but refrained from commenting despite knowing how Alexander was about to completely lie to his boss.

”Yeah, I’ve got some kind of virus on my phone. Was planning on getting it sorted out later this week, but someone got into my camera roll last night and well...” Alex trailed off, knowing how unconvincing his explanation sounded but knowing he couldn’t back down now.

Jefferson subtly rolled his eyes at Alexander’s words, and would definitely have sarcastically commented on how pathetic Alex sounded under different circumstances. Thankfully the man was standing behind Washington so his gesture went unnoticed by the President, and Washington simply cleared his throat.

”Well, Secretary Hamilton, I suggest that you get this so called ‘virus’ under control as soon as possible” Washington stated, his eyes shining with knowledge and awareness, but Alex simply averted his gaze and nodded.

”I need to go and make some calls in regards to the newspapers, and potentially—“ the President began, but was surprisingly interrupted by Jefferson, who’d remained uncharacteristically quiet throughout the entire meeting.

”Sir, I want to apologise. I know that my behaviour has been completely unacceptable, and not something that you can accept from any member of your cabinet. I’m very sorry, but this situation can be at least partially resolved if I am no longer your Secretary of State or associated with your government. You’ll have my resignation by this afternoon”

Jefferson’s voice was quietly pained, but the Virginian resolutely held his head high as he maintained eye contact with Washington.

Alexander felt his mouth fall open in a mixture of shock and guilt.

No, this wasn’t right.

Thomas couldn’t resign, this situation hadn’t been his fault! He didn’t deserve to lose his job!

Oh god, this was all Alexander’s fault...

Thankfully, Washington clearly hadn’t been expecting the Virginian’s resignation statement either, and simply stared in surprise before snapping himself out of his daze to respond.

”No, no, Secretary Jefferson...no, it wasn’t my intention to make you feel as if you need to resign—“

”Sir, it’s the only way the newspaper’s stories won’t continue growing, and it’s not like I don’t deserve to be fired” Jefferson replied, his words laced with pain but strongly delivered.

It was clear that the man genuinely believed that he should lose his job as a result of the photo being leaked and the subsequent scandal that was currently manifesting itself on and offline.

”Jefferson, there is no way that I am able to accept your resignation. You are the only person who I want and could ever imagine as my Secretary of State. You’re an incredibly intelligent, charismatic, hardworking, talented and invaluable young man who I have the pleasure of employing and working alongside” Washington stated, his tone resolute and words filled with truth. Both Secretaries remained quiet as the President continued.

”Of course I would rather that this situation wasn’t occurring, and yes, it won’t be an easy story to stifle in the newspapers, but you’re not at fault here—”

”Yes, I am! It’s me in the photo! I took the photo and decided to share it!” Thomas exclaimed, his exasperatedly strained voice cracking ever so slightly, but Washington shook his head.

”Son, we all do unfortunate things. We all make mistakes and lapses in our judgements. But you have the freedom and right to take photos of yourself in..that nature, and you’ve just been incredibly unlucky and unfortunate that this situation has happened. You are not to blame. You didn’t deliberately leak the photo, or intentionally cause this situation to happen. It’s not your fault, and you didn’t deserve this. And you are not permitted to resign and lose your job over something that you didn’t intentionally cause”

Washington’s caring but firm tone had an essence of finality to it, and Thomas Jefferson closed his mouth in acceptance. The slightly flushed Virginian took a moment to compose himself, before meeting Washington’s intense gaze and nodding softly.

”Yes, Sir”

Washington returned the younger man’s nod and briefly ran his hands over his face before straightening up and making his way towards the cabinet room’s exit. Both Secretaries automatically assumed that the meeting was over, but Washington held up his hand to pause their movements.

”I need to go make some calls, but it’s clear that you two have plenty to discuss and some... private issues to sort out. I don’t wish to hear the extensive details of your relationship—“

”We’re not in a relationship!” Alexander and Thomas exclaimed simultaneously, but Washington only quirked his eyebrows slightly in mild amusement before continuing.

”You need to sort out your differences and fix whatever’s happened between the two of you. I do not want this tension to continue causing an atmosphere within the workplace and continuing to prohibit both of you from fulfilling your full potentials. Stay and talk. And please, for the love of god, make sure that your personal business never mixes with work or politics again”

And with that, Washington bid the two younger men goodbye, a small knowing smile ghosting over his lips as the President shut the cabinet meeting room door closed behind him.

Alexander felt as if he were in a dream. He’d really just been instructed to work out his ‘tension’ (whatever Washington was implying with that statement) by the President of the United States. That was definitely not something he’d ever expected to hear, especially when Thomas Jefferson was concerned.

At the thought of the other man, Alex turned round and witnessed his rival sitting back on a nearby desk. Jefferson had clearly been holding himself together in front of Washington, and it looked as if all the stress and tension that the man had been harbouring was currently taking its toll on the Virginian; Jefferson let his legs hang over the front of the desk as he let out an audible sigh, his shoulders slumped and hands running through his hair before coming down to gently hold his face.

The sight caused Alexander’s chest to clench tightly once again, and the immigrant found himself suddenly desperate to communicate with the Virginian he usually detested.

“I’m sorry” Alex found himself blurting out into the silent room, his words echoing slightly in the emptiness surrounding and in between the two men.

Thomas Jefferson didn’t react for a moment, and Alex was starting to wonder if the man was possibly too involved with his own thoughts to have heard him, when a small chuckle was heard through Thomas’ palms.

Alexander stared in confusion as Jefferson lifted his head up and continued laughing, the sound escaping from the man’s lips so icily that it was almost as if the temperature physically dropped between the pair. 

“For what, Hamilton?”

The Virginian’s tone was incredibly mocking and devoid of any warmth, which instantly caused the hairs on the back of Alexander’s neck to rise.

Alex felt himself automatically responding to the familiar sarcasm and coldness that Jefferson frequently projected towards him. Alexander wanted to communicate with the other man, and was actively attempting to apologise, so why did Jefferson have to act like his usual spiteful and arrogant self? Didn’t he want Alex to apologise?

“What do you mean ‘for what’? Are you really that ignorant, or do you just think it’s a good time to exploit my apology? I’m trying to communicate here, so play your part Jefferson!” Alex snapped, instantly scowling and reverting back to his usual defensive self.

Thomas stared at the shorter man’s glare for a few seconds, before fluidly lifting himself off the desk, approaching Alexander with purpose, and opening his mouth with shining eyes.

”What exactly are you sorry for, Alexander?  
Are you sorry that I’ve just had to discuss my nudes with the President?  
Are you sorry that everyone who works with us, aka the entire government, has seen a photo of me naked?  
Are you sorry that the entire population of the United States will soon be able to see the photo if they simply glance at a newspaper?  
Are you sorry for enabling your so-called friend to access and send out the nudes that I sent privately for you and ONLY you to see?  
Or are you sorry for inviting me over last night and throwing a hissy fit when I didn’t want to have sex with you?  
What. Are. You. Sorry. For?” 

Thomas finished his outburst by punctuating his last words, the man’s body trembling slightly (Alex couldn’t determine if due to anger or emotion), and glared venomously into Alexander’s eyes.

As Alex processed all the content contained within the Virginian’s rant, he knew that Thomas Jefferson was completely right. He was severely at fault, and had significantly more than one thing to apologise for...

Yet, the immigrant focused on the last point made in Thomas’ list, and felt his blood automatically begin to boil with frustration, confusion and annoyance. How could Thomas stand there and accuse Alex of ‘throwing a hissy fit’ the previous night? Thomas had been the one who’d rudely left without providing Alex with any kind of explanation!

”Excuse me?” Alexander found himself challenging instead of apologising, his gaze hardening as a flood of words built up pressure behind his closed mouth. The man tried to calm himself down, but John’s theorising words from the previous night came flooding back to him.

Perhaps it was true that Jefferson had felt threatened by the dominance Alex blatantly expressed at work, and had simply gone along with his attraction to Alex with the intention of gaining back control in the bedroom, or to raise his own self-esteem? 

What if Jefferson had flirted and made out with him only for his own gain and interest? Perhaps he’d actually intended to blackmail or extort?

Or maybe Jefferson wasn’t even attracted to him at all, was actually homophobic, and had actually been disgusted by the thought of having sex with Alex?

These tidal waves of thoughts swirled around Alexander’s mind, none becoming understood or confirmed, and only succeeding in raising the man’s level of annoyance.

Alex was snapped out of his own questions as he noticed how Jefferson was still staring at him, the man folding his arms and raising his eyebrows at Alex’s uncharacteristic hesitation. This typical gesture often displayed during their cabinet battles caused Alexander’s frown to increase and his mouth to naturally open.

”You’re such a hypocrite! I’m pretty sure that I wasn’t the one who ‘threw a hissy fit’ last night, Jefferson! One second you were enjoying yourself, and the next you freaked out for no apparent reason! Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you? I can’t work out if you’re a self-hating homophobe, or if you had some plan to extort me and panicked when you realised that you were out of your depth and started submitting! Or did you just want to gain back some control by having your way with me? ”

Alex’s blunt accusations were met with Thomas Jefferson’s eyes widening in what appeared to be disbelief. The taller man took a few paces backwards and wore an expression combined from confusion and shock, all anger leaving the man’s enlarged eyes.

”You think....what?” Jefferson asked quietly, the man running another hand through his curls in bitter bewilderment. This repeated action only annoyed Alex further.

”You heard me. What else am I supposed to think?” 

It was quiet between the pair for another tense moment, the men standing apart but maintaining eye contact. Alex’s glare burned into Jefferson’s eyes, the Virginian stared right back but with his pupils empty and his mind elsewhere. 

Thomas broke the contact few seconds later with a cold laugh and shake of his head, and began pulling on his jacket. Alex blinked at the other man’s actions that clearly implied that the Virginian intended on leaving in the middle of their conversation, which was incredibly out of character for stubborn Thomas ‘I always want to have the final word’ Jefferson!

”What are you doing?”

”What does it look like, Hamilton? I’m not wasting any more of my precious time talking to you” Thomas replied in disdain, but the spoken arrogance failed to reach the Virginian’s eyes. 

”We’re not finished, Jefferson!” Alexander exclaimed angrily.

”Yes, we are”

”No, we’re not!” the shorter man stated firmly, standing in the Virginian’s way with his arms crossed defiantly as Jefferson started walking towards the door.

”Get out of my way, Hamilton”

”No! You haven’t given me an explanation!”

”What is there to bother explaining?”

”Are you serious?! You haven’t answered my question! Why did you walk out yesterday?”

The Federalist stared down the Virginian despite his shorter height, and Thomas Jefferson briefly closed his eyes as if to compose himself, breathing deeply through his nose.

”You really...you really think that about me?” the man asked quietly, and the surprisingly soft tone of his voice screamed subtle vulnerability which caught Alex off guard.

”What?”

”You actually think that I would have flirted, with you, sent you nudes, and made out with you if I was homophobic or not attracted to you? Or just because I wanted to...what, blackmail you? Extort you? Is that what you thought this entire time?” Thomas asked in a rush, raising his dormant eyes from the floor to connect with Alex’s gaze again.

”No..I just-“ Alex began, surprisingly slow for words for once in his life.

”I mean—what was I supposed to think when you just left?” he questioned, suddenly feeling like speaking his mind so bluntly and forcefully hadn’t been the best decision to make.

He knew that he needed to apologise and make things right with the man in front of him, but desperately needed to understand Thomas Jefferson's actions and motives.

”Look, I know you hate me—” Thomas began, moving backwards to sit down in a nearby chair, indicating that his intention of leaving was at least postponed for the moment. Alex remained standing and forced himself to hold his tongue and wait for the Virginian to continue.

”—but..but I don’t know how you could think that I’d stoop so low as to do something like...” Thomas trailed off, before shaking his head. Alex opened his mouth out of habit, and Thomas instantly continued speaking as if he feared he wouldn’t get another word in if Alex started talking.

”I panicked”

These two simple words froze both Alexander’s mind and body.

”What?” he asked, his voice sounding hollow and distant to his own ears.

“I..I panicked, okay? I got overwhelmed. It was all too much” Thomas breathed, his face burning and eyes downcast, the man clearly struggling to verbalise his personal thoughts and emotions to Alexander.

Alex felt his stomach drop horribly at the Virginian’s brief but powerful statements. All previous thoughts and feelings of annoyance and confusion vanished as the immigrant found himself consumed by horror and guilt.

Oh god, this had been what he’d originally feared! Thomas...he hadn’t wanted to make out with Alexander at all! The man must have gone along with Alexander’s ministrations out of shock or fear, and became overwhelmed and terrified when Alex had blatantly assumed that he had Thomas’ consent and started initiating further sexual contact.

Thomas hadn’t consented. He hadn’t been enjoying himself. He hadn’t wanted to have sex. Alexander had been was so consumed by his own lust that he hadn’t noticed how his partner wasn’t okay.

Alexander’s hurricane of thoughts and emotions exploded and the man found himself word vomiting in front of Thomas Jefferson before the other man could continue.

”Oh my god, Thomas, I am so sorry. I just assumed that you were into me and wanted to..to kiss and have sex with me, but I didn’t realise that you didn’t want to do anything! I should have stopped and checked to see if you were alright and gotten your verbal consent, but I didn’t think and I was so focused on how you were making me feel! I didn’t know that you were upset and I’m so fucking sorry for being so stupid and selfish and self-centred and I’m so so sorry and—“

Alex absently sank into a chair next to Thomas Jefferson as he continued emotionally ranting without restraint, but heard his voice crack as he truly realised how awful he’d been the previous night. How could he have done something like that? God, he owed Thomas Jefferson so fucking much...

”Alex! It’s okay, chill!”

Warm palms took ahold of Alexander’s own restless hands, and Alex found himself facing the Virginian as countless apologies died on his tongue. Thomas’ familiar chestnut eyes were all he could see, and the Federalist attempted to ground himself by registering how Thomas was telling him to take deep breaths while still holding his hands firmly.

Once Alex had calmed down enough, (even though his mind still raced with guilty thoughts and regret), Thomas removed his hands from the shorter man’s and shook his head. Alex held his tongue in anticipation of what the Virginian was about to explain.

”Alex, I wanted to kiss you. I kissed you back because I wanted you. You don’t need to apologise for anything like that—” Thomas began, a small smile ghosting his lips.

”What? But I thought you just said—“

”You misunderstood what I was saying. Or rather, I wasn’t clear. I find it difficult to talk about stuff like this, so give me a second, okay?”

Holding his tongue as the Virginian attempted to organise his thoughts and translate his feelings into spoken words, Alex waited for the other man to be ready. Waiting instead of speaking or taking action wasn’t familiar with the Federalist, but Alexander forced himself to slow down for Thomas’ sake.

It was the least he could do for the other man. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i decided AGAIN to split this chapter, because i thought up a better ending and need time to write it lmao. So here’s the next part of the story, hope u enjoy xx  
> Final chapter will be up idk when but it’s coming!

”I’m just going to come clean and start at the beginning. Don’t interrupt me, or I won’t be able to..to get it all said” the Virginian stated after a moment of contemplation, Thomas raising his eyes to connect his gaze with Alex’s. Unspoken tension hovered between the rivals as Thomas took a deep breath and began speaking.

”So..if you hadn’t guessed already, I had a crush on you” the Virginian breathed, and Alex felt his stomach drop to the floor. 

“From..from the moment we first clashed in our first cabinet meeting, I started..liking you. And that’s why I kissed you back last night, not because I had some elaborate plan to extort or blackmail you! Or because I wanted to what, ‘gain back control’ over you? Jesus, how paranoid can you get...” Thomas’ cheeks heated up as he continued, the burning so strong that a change in colour was visible despite the man’s dark complexion.

”Anyway...I kissed you because I liked you. You were just so...incredible. Annoying as hell and infuriating, but brilliant all the same. Your mind was always working at full speed without fail, your intelligence was obvious, you were always so determined, confident, ruthless, passionate...and I’d never admired another person’s mind so truly until I met you.”

A ghost of a smile hovered over the Virginian’s face as the man continued describing Alexander. It was obvious that Thomas needed to let everything off his chest in one go, and Alex used enormous amounts of self-control to ensure that he kept his mouth shut as the Virginian’s honest words washed over him.

”I loved debating with you, even when our fights got too heated or occasionally turned somewhat physical. I told you that I hated you, but I couldn’t hate you no matter how hard I tried. You made me...start to feel different. I knew I was attracted to your mind, but after a while....it wasn’t just your mind that I became attracted to”

Thomas paused briefly, clearly forcing himself to continue explaining himself despite his nervousness or embarrassment. The man’s hands were shaking ever so slightly by his sides, and Alex found himself urging to take ahold of them. 

“Alexander Hamilton, you were the first person I felt attracted to in...a long time. But I’d never felt that way about another man before, so it was—“

”Wait, that doesn’t make any sense!” Alex’s erupting thoughts burst off his previously restrained tongue, and Thomas immediately frowned in confusion at the interruption.

”What doesn’t make any sense?” he replied, the man’s nervousness and stress subtly seeking into his strained tone. The Virginian looked nervous, as if dreading for Alexander to speak at all in reaction to Thomas’ confession.

“I’m the first man you’ve ever wanted to be with?” Alex asked, and continued when Thomas nodded.

”That doesn’t make any sense...” the immigrant wondered out loud, and Thomas frowned.

”What are you talking about?”

”It’s just...a few years back when you were still working in France and Washington first announced that you’d soon be coming back to work in New York, there was a lot of...talk” Alex began slowly, knowing that the conversation was about to severely go off topic despite Thomas’ wishes to simply speak without interruption.

”What kind of talk?”

“You naturally became a huge topic of conversation, as well as your...um...sex life” Alexander continued speaking as soon as he saw the bewildered expression form on Thomas’ face. 

”Everyone began gossiping and spreading rumours. Girls were saying that they knew friends who’d slept with you, and um...guys were talking about nights they’d had with you. It was said that you had sex every night in France with multiple different people, and that you organised private threesomes, and that your list of kinks included—“

Alex cut himself off as Thomas Jefferson let out a small laugh, leaning back in his chair with an amused but heavily confused expression plastered all over his face. At least the man didn’t look so painfully nervous anymore...

”Alexander...do you wanna know what I spent my free time doing in France?” the man asked lightly after a moment, and Alex nodded uncertainty as the Virginian continued chuckling to himself.

”When I wasn’t helping Lafayette write revolutionary declarations, I spent all my time exploring Paris gardens, dining at the finest french restaurants, and reading mountains of books in my apartment. And whenever Lafayette forced me to accompany him to nightclubs, which was an activity that I absolutely detested doing and avoided at all costs, I spent the evening drinking excessively, rejecting dance offers, and trying to find the best opportunity to leave”

Alex found himself staring in surprise with his mouth slightly open at Thomas’ explanation, and the Virginian met the man’s shocked gaze with a small smile.

”I don’t know why y’all were saying all those things about me before I arrived back here, but I can assure you that I didn’t have sex with anyone while I was in France, and not even before I left, for that matter”

”I thought...” Alex began slowly, not exactly sure if verbalising his surprise at Thomas’ lack of sex life was the wisest decision.

”You thought what?” Thomas pressed, raising his eyebrows slightly with an unreadable expression growing on his face.

”I just...didn’t expect you to...y’know, not be into having sex a lot. You act so confident and outgoing, I just assumed that you’d...” Alexander trailed off.

”That I’m experienced and have a lot of sex?”

”Well..yeah” Alex agreed, not wishing to sound like an asshole but still wanting to be honest with the Virginian.

”Is that why you made out with me? Because you thought that I was experienced?” Thomas asked, his voice rather quiet and subdued as the man absently lowered his eyes and cleared his throat. Alex caught onto what the Virginian was suggesting and immediately knew he had to clarify his words and intentions. 

”No! I mean...yes, I thought that you were more experienced, but that’s not why I kissed you” the immigrant spoke, and Thomas glanced upwards at his words.

Alex opened his mouth to state exactly why he’d chosen to kiss Thomas Jefferson the previous night, but...suddenly felt embarrassed, not unlike an awkward teenager. Alex desperately wished to change the subject and focus on something other than the colour of the Virginian’s widened eyes, and found himself blurting out the first somewhat irrelevant thought that came into his head.

”Wait..so you really haven’t been having sex?” he asked lightly in an attempt to lighten the mood between them, and Thomas shook his head slowly after a moment.

”You don’t believe me?” the Virginian asked with quirked eyebrows.

”Jefferson, your political opinions are utter shit, but I’m not blind. It’s obvious that you’re the most physically attractive man working here. If you’re not getting laid, then god help the rest of us! When was the last time you had sex?” Alexander let his mouth go slightly as he attempted to joke and remove any awkward tension between the pair, but Thomas only gave him a small smile as his eyes clouded slightly.

”It’s been a while...I haven’t wanted to since my college girlfriend died” he stated matter of factly, and Alex instantly knew that he’d said the wrong thing yet again.

However, before he could apologise for his insensitive and prying questions, Thomas continued in an even smaller voice.

“And you, Alexander Hamilton....are the first god damn person who I’ve felt attracted to since. I hadn’t felt this way in a long time towards anyone, let alone another man. That opened up a whole new conversation that I’d never anticipated having with myself. Suddenly I’m...bisexual? Or just...straight but with you being my exception? I don’t know” Thomas shook his head in confusion, shrugging his shoulders and sighing. 

”I’m sorry for asking, you didn’t have to tell me that about..about your girlfriend” Alex apologised lowly, but Thomas just shook his head once again, his emotionless gaze falling to the floor.

Silence settled between the pair once again, Thomas seemingly lost in thought after spilling his heart out, and Alex momentarily stunned as his usually non-stop mind slowed down to process all that the Virginian had just told him.

Thomas Jefferson found him attractive.

Thomas Jefferson thought that he was brilliant.

Thomas Jefferson hadn’t been trying to extort or blackmail him, and had acted upon his feelings.

Thomas Jefferson had wanted to kiss him because he actually liked Alex.

Thomas wasn’t this sex addict maniac that rumours and gossip had painted him out to be.

Thomas Jefferson had never been with another man romantically or sexually before....

“That’s why you panicked?”

Alex abruptly spoke, his running mind and mouth resuming their connection as the immigrant began audibly voicing his thoughts. Thomas looked up from his lap, an unreadable expression layered on his face as Alex continued.

”You panicked because..you’ve never been with another man before?” Alex needed to clarify, and his mind immediately flooded with understanding when Thomas gave a small nod in confirmation.

Everything suddenly made so much more sense! Thomas had abruptly gone from being passionately submissive (but still engaged and receptive), to being terrified and closed off from Alexander...simply because everything had been new to him! He’d gotten overwhelmed in the unfamiliar situation and reacted by freaking out and leaving as soon as he could.

”I got overwhelmed” Thomas repeated quietly as he watched Alex’s eyes filling with understanding and knowledge.

“Because of the situation? Or...because of me?” Alexander questioned gently, his heart subconsciously clenching slightly in anticipation of the answer.

”Because of the situation and you” the Virginian replied, and quickly continued as soon as he saw the look of alarm displaying itself on Alex’s face.

“You don’t need to feel bad about that. I’m the one who fucked up there. That wasn’t your fault. It was just...you were moving very fast in the moment. I hadn’t done anything like what we were doing before. It was all new to me and got...a bit too much. My mind couldn’t process what you were doing before you’d moved on to doing something else..” 

”I’m so sorry—“

”But I loved what you were doing! I wanted you to keep going and do all that you were doing...but I just let my mind get the better of me, that’s all.”

Thomas chuckled slightly, and Alex felt his chest clench when he realised that the Virginian was still nervous. Alexander found himself taking a deep breath and reaching out to take ahold of Thomas’ clenched hands, and felt more confident about continuing their conversation when the Virginian didn’t look disgusted or remove himself from the physical contact.

”What do you mean? How did your mind get the better of you?”

”I just...didn’t know how to be enough”

This quiet admission hadn’t been what Alexander had expected the other man to say at all.

”What?”

Thomas nervously chucked again, pulling his hands from Alex’s grip and running them through his curls.

”It’s stupid. You don’t need to hear about it. God, I’ve already said way too much already. I’m being pathetic, and you’re probably just going to tell everyone about all this and laugh at me like you always do so let’s not—“

”No! No, no, Thomas, I’m not going to tell anyone about what you’ve told me! I’ve been a complete dick but..it’s important to finally talk about all that’s happened. I just...don’t want you to keep all this inside if it’s something you need to speak about, but don’t feel like you have to explain yourself to me if you don’t want to”

Alex’s genuine and heartfelt words lingered between the rivals for another moment, before Thomas took a deep breath and continued speaking without commenting on Alex’s words, clearly indicating his decision to continue explaining himself to the other man.

“I didn’t know how to be enough for you. Partly because you’re a man, and partly because you’re...you”

These words chilled Alex’s heart and his eyes widened in confusion and surprise. What did Thomas mean?

”What do you mean, Thomas? Why wouldn’t you be good enough..for me?” he voiced his thoughts, and Thomas let out a small laugh as if the answer was painfully obvious

“Picture it like this. Alexander Hamilton, a sexually experienced, incredibly confident and beautiful man, having sex with poor Thomas Jefferson...a sexually inexperienced, sexually awkward, and sexually ignorant guy. How do you think that would have played out?” the Virginian began, and Alex stared in shock as the man continued.

”We were seconds away from you realising that, unlike you, I had no fucking idea what I was doing! I don’t know how to...to please or satisfy another man. I don’t know how to be good. I was going to let you down no matter what, it was inevitable. Especially seeing as you’d thought that I was some kind of ‘Sex God’ or whatever people had been saying—-”

”Thomas...”

”How was I ever going to be enough for you, Alexander? You would’ve just gotten upset with me...or gotten angry, or laughed. I didn’t want to disappoint you, or give you another reason to publicly humiliate me, so...I thought it would be better if it all just stopped”

Alex felt ice churn through his veins at Thomas words. Did the Virginian truly see Alexander as this ruthless, selfish and uncaring monster that the man had just described?

”Thomas...I wouldn’t have done any of those things—“

”Oh, really?” the Virginian chucked coldly, before beginning to poorly imitate the shorter man’s voice.

”What the fuck, Jefferson? Can’t handle me in the bedroom? Can’t keep up with me? Can’t take my dick? Wow, you’re a disappointment! Never thought you’d be such a pussy in bed! How about I tell everyone about this in our next cabinet meeting, huh? Would you like that?”

Pain laced with guilt blossomed sharply within Alex’s heart at the man’s words, and the Federalist’s mind immediately flashed back to the cruel outburst that he’d shouted the previous night when Thomas had been trying to leave. Even though the Virginian hadn’t quoted direct things that Alexander had said, the imitated tone of Jefferson’s voice was spot on. It was the exact tone the Federalist used when he’d decided to weaponise something and use it to his advantage against an enemy. In this case, the underlying threat of exposure. Alexander would let his anger control his words and actions, and do anything for the chance to humiliate Thomas...

Would Alex have actually used the events that had occurred the previous night to embarrass and shame Thomas publicly?

He wasn’t sure...no, no! He wouldn’t have. Alexander knew his moral code could be rusty at times, but he would never stoop that low!

But...it was definitely something that Alexander would be predicted to do. He could even picture himself unchaining his tongue and letting his insults run wild in a future cabinet meeting. Hell, he’d done similar things in the past.

Silence had descended like a dense fog between the two men once again, and this time Alex struggled to even see a way to break the invisible barrier. Thomas Jefferson, with his gaze lowered and hands fidgeting, didn’t appear to have anything else to say to Alexander.

Or rather, the man didn’t want to vocalise his feelings any longer.

Was he worried that he’d said too much, and that Alex was simply going to use his hidden emotions and secrets against him in the future?

”Thomas—“ Alex began hesitantly, but was cut off by said Virginian interrupting him sharply as the taller man abruptly moved off the desk which he’d been sitting on.

“Let’s just agree not to speak about this again. You obviously don’t like me back, which is fine. My political career and dignity is going to be shredded and in tatters by tomorrow morning when the newspapers finish printing, so I’ve got to get back to work now and stop wasting my time pointlessly explaining myself to you” 

”No, wait! Thomas, please, I need to explain—“ Alex felt despair and panic prick his words as the taller man began moving towards the cabinet room exit. He couldn’t let this conversation end until the pair had come to terms with each other, and found a way to sort everything out...

”Please.. just talk to me?” he tried as Thomas wrapped his hand around the door handle.

”I just did, Hamilton, and it’s not going to change anything” the man sighed, his exhausted eyes not bothering to meet Alexander’s gaze. The door was flung open and closed with a sense of finality behind the figure of Thomas Jefferson, leaving Alexander Hamilton with his own confessions and explanations trapped and dying on the tip of his tongue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope this was alright, and the next chapter will be the final one x


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> me: the next chapter will be the last!  
> also me: *adds another chapter*
> 
> yeah, we don’t talk about it.  
> Thought my absence was getting too long so i decided to split the FINAL chapter (this is getting ridiculous now ffs) into ANOTHER TWO because it’s CHRISTMAS and i felt bad about being a slow writer lmao.  
> Enjoy!

Have you ever known something was inevitable, but still tried to convince yourself to believe that everything would somehow magically work itself out and be alright?

That’s exactly the thought which repeatedly crossed Alexander Hamilton’s mind that night after his conversation with Thomas Jefferson.

Uncharacteristically for the Federalist Party member, Alex had found himself without the physical or mental energy to be productive and apply himself to any work-related projects that evening after finishing work. The man didn’t even have the simple will to write anything at all, which was incredibly strange for the usually non-stop immigrant.

Alex found his head continuously polluted with thoughts all relating to Thomas Jefferson and the events which had occurred earlier in the day, and simply gave up trying to tame his mind into concentrating. Exhausted, the man had decided to try sleeping in the hope of silencing his stream of thoughts, but the darkness unfortunately provided no distractions and only worsened Alexander’s growing anxiety.

He’d been endlessly tossing and turning around in bed for what seemed like hours, and finally decided with a frustrated but defeated sigh to lie still and directly address his relentless mind. The bedroom window of his New York apartment stood ajar and was accompanied by flowing curtains, which allowed for an illuminating strip of light to flood across Alex’s bed. The comforting hum of the never-sleeping city was left to comfort his ears.

The image of Thomas Jefferson’s pained but resigned face plastered across Alexander’s closed eyelids once again, and the immigrant ran a hand over his face in defeat.

Perhaps this was all simply a nightmare. Maybe it was possible that Alex’s non-stop mind had dreamt up all the events which had occurred in the last twenty four hours.

What if John had never leaked the photos, and the newspapers weren’t currently printing thousands of copies of Thomas’ nudes to plaster aggressively over their front covers? 

Maybe all their work colleagues didn’t have the photos saved on their phones, and weren’t going to continue spewing their verbal harassment tomorrow at work?

Was it possible that Thomas Jefferson wasn’t likely to be crying into his own bedsheets right now? Maybe the other man was lying fast asleep, sleeping soundly with his political career thriving and not about to be ripped to shreds...

God, how could fictional thoughts be so comforting yet cruel at the same time?

Alexander blinked emptily into the surrounding darkness as the last of his imagined scenarios were consumed by the impending force of reality.

There was absolutely nothing he could do to stop the impending attack. This wasn’t like a war battle, where strategies could be devised at the last minute and a simple barked order had the power to save lives.

But this situation wasn’t a physical fight, and the media wasn’t an enemy that could be defeated. It would have been difficult enough to remove Thomas’ nudes from the internet alone, but all hope was destroyed when newspapers had gotten ahold of the content.

And it wasn’t as if Thomas could even surrender in this battle; his naked photo would be staining the front pages of every newspaper no matter what. The papers would available to be purchased by every New Yorker in only a few hours time, and there was nothing anybody in the country could do to stop them.

“Fuck” Alex sighed, and rolled onto his side to stare blankly at his bedroom window.

Being completely helpless in this situation wasn’t a nice feeling, and Alex knew that his own name would be of interest tomorrow in the papers as well as Thomas Jeffersons’. After all, the photos had come from his phone, and it wasn’t as if people hadn’t already been questioning whether or not the pair were in a relationship...

To put it simply, they were pretty fucked. With a humourless laugh, Alexander noted how he could now only hope and pray that the impeding damage inflicted wouldn’t be catastrophic, and that both Thomas and himself could publicly and privately handle what was to come...

———————————————————-

John Laurens couldn’t ignore the commotion happening at the newspaper stands as his feet dragged through New York City. No matter how hard he tried to escape from his surroundings, his ears heard the sellers shouting, his eyes witnessed the customers gossiping, and he couldn’t draw his gaze away from the bold printed headlines displayed on almost every street corner.

‘SOUTHERN SECRETARY SCANDAL’ 

‘Hamilton EXPOSES ALL of Jefferson’ 

‘JEFFERSON NUDES LEAKED BY RIVAL’

‘Jefferson and Hamilton; is it Love or Hate?

‘NAKED JEFFERSON; UNCENSORED PHOTOS INSIDE!’ 

’HAMILTON LEAKS JEFFERSON NUDES’

’Thomas JefferSIN; Republican Candidate’s Private Life EXPOSED!’ 

Thomas’ nudes were displayed on almost every newspaper front page. Accompanied by dominating headlines and degrading subheadings, it was evident that the papers had the sole intention of pouring fuel onto the fire and aiding in humiliating the Virginian. There was big money to be made in a nude scandal involving not just one but two of the President’s Secretaries, and it was obvious that all newspaper companies had chosen to seize the given opportunity.

Everywhere he looked, even when he closed his eyes, John could see the photo of Thomas Jefferson permanently burned into his vision. He recalled the feelings of satisfaction and thrilling revenge that occurred when he’d leaked the photo two nights previously, but all he felt now was hollow emptiness and sickly guilt that strengthened every time he heard a newspaper seller shouting out a headline or witnessed another commuter casually purchasing a paper.

He hadn’t thought about the consequences of sending out that photo. He’d NEVER imagined anything like this to happen when he simply clicked ‘send’.

All he’d wanted was to make Thomas Jefferson momentarily hurt and embarrassed, but had no intention of permanently staining the man’s political career by causing a governmental scandal. And even if his intentions had been debatably good and simply to help Alex get ‘revenge’, nothing positive would have come from the situation seeing as Alexander himself was actively involved in the public scandal. 

If he was deeply honest with himself, John knew he’d acted out of pure jealously. He’d felt pain at the fact that Alexander had been interested in Jefferson instead of him, and decided to seek unjustifiable revenge on a man who’d never touched a hair on John’s head. It was an incredibly cold thing to do, and John found himself disgusted at his own actions.

Picking up a nearby paper from another stand as he stopped on another street corner, John’s eyes locked his gaze on the front page. This specific paper had gone with the particularly horrible headline of ’JEFFERSLUT UNCLOTHED; how BIG is he?‘, which displayed itself above the naked photo of Thomas Jefferson. The man’s private parts had been poorly blurred out, but the viewer’s attention wouldn’t stray to look anywhere else due to the newspaper having photoshopped a bright red arrow pointing directly at Jefferson’s genitals. 

John cast his eyes upwards and towards the Virginian’s pixelated face. Jefferson was flashing a slightly cocky grin at the camera, which had only made John feel even more angry when he’d viewed the photo two nights previously. The arrogance depicted in the smile had made it easier for John to view the man as a heartless villain. However, it was now noticeable that the smile was genuine, and this only made John feel worse. 

Thomas Jefferson had been happy when he’d taken the photo. The Virginian had been responding to a similar photo that Alexander had sent him first, and had clearly wanted to reciprocate the sexual implications that Alex had instigated. But most importantly, the nude had been for Alexander Hamilton’s eyes, and his eyes only. 

“You looking to buy that mate?”

John realised that he’d been staring at the newspaper front cover for so long that he’d attracted the attention of the stand seller.

”Oh I—um, no thanks” he muttered, placing the paper down next to dozens of other copies all displaying the same smiling image of Thomas Jefferson. The newspaper seller shrugged and glanced down at the photos, before letting out a short laugh.

“Wasn’t this guy tipped to be a future presidential candidate?” the man asked, and John blinked at the unexpected question.

”I’m not sure man, maybe”

”Well, certainly won’t be now, will he? Dirty unnatural behaviour” the seller stated, shaking his head in obvious disgust. John snapped out of his own thoughts at the man’s words and icy tone of voice, and narrowed his eyes.

”Excuse me?” he asked after a moment, and the newspaper seller seemed oblivious to the sharpness in John’s voice.

”Faggot got what he deserved, didn’t he? Disgusting behaviour. This country deserves to have good and responsible people in government, and then one of them turns out to be a slutty fucking queer behind closed doors! Imagine, that faggot could have been our future President!” the man laughed, shaking his head and remaining oblivious to the anger suddenly displaying itself across John’s face.

”Sorry, but what the fuck is wrong with you?” John glared, his fists clenching in anger at the seller’s words.

The man seemed momentarily surprised at John’s outburst, before a sneer spread across his greasy features.

”Oh don’t tell me, you’re a fucking queer too?” 

”Yes, as a matter of fact I am” John snapped, and continued speaking over the other man’s laughter.

”Who the fuck do you think you are? How dare you call anyone a...that word! Let’s be real here, buddy, your job is shit and you look like you haven’t had a shower in weeks. You’re standing there making ignorant, homophobic comments about Thomas Jefferson, and you’re completely oblivious to the fact that this man who’s on the front cover of all these newspapers is better than you in every single way! Shut the fuck up” John hissed, the volume of his voice raising and attracting the attention of a number of passers by.

The newspaper seller’s vicious smirk turned defensively sour at John’s words.

”Don’t know what planet you’re on, mate, but any man who sucks dick is the lowest of the low. I’m just glad that this rich fag’s private life has been exposed so I can make some money from the scandal and don’t end up voting for such a disgusting piece of shit in five years time. If I had my way, all you queers would be locked up away from the rest of society, and not even that Jefferson faggot would be able to save himself from—“ 

The newspaper seller’s hateful words were abruptly cut off by John Lauren’s fist colliding directly into the man’s smirking face.

————————————————————-

Having only succeeded in sleeping for barely an hour, Alexander had hauled himself out of bed in the early hours of the morning and currently found himself standing outside work, accompanied by his textbook eye-bags and a sense of impending dread that curled tightly in his stomach. Alex knew that he must look more terrible than usual (the state of his appearance was never his top priority when working), but he decided to focus upon making it through the day without succumbing to his tiredness, guilt or rising humiliation.

Naturally, the immigrant had seen the morning papers adorned with Thomas Jefferson’s photo and horribly degrading titles. Even if he attempted to avoid seeing the newspapers, his phone was repeatedly blowing up with texts regarding his involvement, and even the radio station playing in his car had commented on the matter while he’d driven to work.

Sighing, Alex began quickly walking towards the building’s entrance. As much as he was dreading work today and would much rather spend his time outside avoiding people, the Federalist knew that it was only a matter of time before reporters would be arriving, hungry for new information and ruthless in their questioning. Waiting around aimlessly as a target wasn’t an option.

Thankfully, the early hour of the morning meant that there weren’t extensive amounts of work colleagues for Alex to bump into as he began walking through the building. Those who were present and did stare at him, either with cruel amusement or pity, refrained from verbally addressing him, and Alex wondered how obvious it was to observers how exhausted he currently was both physically and mentally.

His purpose for the day was simple; throw himself into his work and attempt to block out everyone and everything to avoid the situation from getting any worse.

”Alexander”

The familiar booming voice behind him abruptly snapped Alex out of his own thoughts, and the man reluctantly turned around to face George Washington, without even bothering to hide his tiredness and reluctance from his face.

The President regraded Alexander for a moment in silence, before letting out a small sigh and gesturing for the younger man to enter into his office. Alex naturally complied despite his wish to be anywhere else, and soon found himself sitting opposite Washington. An uncomfortable silence momentarily settled between the duo, before the older man cleared his throat.

”Did Secretary Jefferson come into work with you?”

This was an unexpected (and stupid) question that Alexander hadn’t expected Washington to open their discussion with.

”No Sir, he didn’t. Why would he?” Alexander replied tiredly with a frown creasing his forehead.

”Well, I just wondered if the pair of you were....” Washington began, but Alex felt his previously restrained level of annoyance rise dangerously and be expressed in his words.

”What? Car sharing? Living together? Having beautiful sex and being completely oblivious to what’s going on outside?” Alexander snapped, glaring up at Washington. His mentor narrowed his eyes at Alexander’s words and his expression turned stony.

“Watch your tone, son. You do not have the right to turn your anger on others just because of the situation you are now in. I only asked you if you came into work with Secretary Jefferson because newspaper and television reporters will be arriving outside soon, and Secretary Jefferson hasn’t arrived to work yet”

Well shit.

”I apologise, Sir” Alex spoke after a moment, his annoyance and anger sinking to the pit of his stomach and being replaced with emptiness. His despair must have been evident on his face, because Washington’s hard expression softened.

”It’s alright, son. I understand how...unfortunate this situation is, but please try to prevent your anger from coming out in your words, especially if you’re confronted by reporters. May I ask, did you and Secretary Jefferson come to an understanding after the cabinet meeting yesterday?” the older man asked softly.

“No, not really” Alex murmured quietly, his eyes locking onto Washington’s desk as the empty feeling continued to consume his insides.

”Ah...I see. Well, naturally I’ve been informed and seen for myself that the media coverage of this...event has been strongly negative so far, but it’s been predicted that this scandal will die out within a week if no new information about you or Secretary Jefferson comes to light”

”I guess that’s good then” Alex muttered, being completely aware of how unreliable that prediction could turn out to be. The truth was that nobody knew when the eyes of America would move away from focusing upon him and Thomas, but he appreciated Washington’s supportive concern all the same.

”In the meantime, I would recommend that you and Secretary Jefferson do all that you can to stay apart and out of the spotlight until the pressure reduces. All the newspapers need is a new photo of you both together, and this story flares up again. I suggest that you refrain from drawing attention to yourself in upcoming cabinet meetings....and it will be easier for Secretary Jefferson to refrain from attending altogether ” Washington said, his eyes conveying how reluctant he truly was about having this conversation. 

This wasn’t something that Alexander was expecting to hear Washington say at all. The younger man took a moment to process exactly what the President had said, before opening his mouth in a horrified protest.

”What?! Sir, with all due respect, that’s a ridiculous idea! How can Thomas do his job if he’s not present in cabinet meetings? Surely it would be best for us to just..continue as if everything’s normal?” Alex exclaimed, but Washington shook his head slowly.

“Sadly, I’m aware of the poor intentions that certain members hold within my cabinet. It’s likely that some people will continue to antagonise and mock Secretary Jefferson in upcoming meetings, which would be incredibly disruptive and damaging to our cabinet schedule” Washington stated, and continued speaking as Alexander began to protest.

”Furthermore, antagonising and angering you as a result of Thomas being targeted during meetings will allow certain cabinet members to have new information regarding the pair of you to sell to the newspapers, and even a simple photo of you and Thomas being present together during a meeting would likely be taken, sold, published and subsequently continue to pour petrol onto this fire.” 

Alex shook his dead in defiance, and leaned back into his chair angrily with a clenched jaw. He hated to admit it, but Washington’s words and fears were valid, and the last thing they needed was for the newspapers to cling onto this updating story and for it to take even longer for things to get back to normal. But there had to be another way that avoided metaphorically throwing Thomas under the bus.

“How’s Thomas going to do his job if he doesn’t know what’s happening in cabinet meetings? He’s not just some irrelevant cabinet member, he’s the Secretary of State! He needs to know what’s going on in order for him to successfully do his job! Banishing him from meetings is only going to make both your and his lives so much harder” Alex said after a moment, and Washington’s mouth twitched at how strongly Alex cared for the Virginian.

”I will ensure that Secretary Jefferson is kept up to date with what’s been discussed and decided in our cabinet meetings, don’t worry”

”But..but why have you picked me over him?” Alex asked frustratedly, and Washington frowned in confusion.

”Son?”

”Why did you choose to kick him out of cabinet meetings, and not me? You saw how people were targeting me as well as Thomas. I’m more disruptive and loudmouthed, and more likely to shout back at people who decide to mock me! You saw how Thomas responded in the last cabinet meeting compared to me; he chose to ignore comments while I was responsible for mass disruption! Just...just because you like me more than him, doesn’t mean that you have to go and make his life more difficult by banning him from attending meetings!” 

Silence settled momentarily between the two men as Alexander breathed heavily after his vocal outburst, and Washington digested all that Alexander had spoken with a frown forming on the older man’s face.

“Son, this wasn’t an emotional or personal decision. I was advised that out of the pair of you, Thomas’ presence in meetings would be more distracting than yours, seeing as it’s his nudes that are currently being broadcasted and not yours. It has been thought that certain members of cabinet will soon get bored of taunting you and leave you alone, but continue to target Thomas with extensive amounts of mockery during meetings until this scandal isn’t focused upon as heavily in the media. Therefore Thomas isn’t permitted to attend upcoming meetings right now” Washington explained gently, and continued when Alexander opened his mouth to defiantly respond.

”And the main reason why I chose to follow this advice was because the next four cabinet meetings are all going to be centred around financial situations and money problems currently present within our country, as well as information regarding the banks. These are areas that directly concern you, and have nothing to do with Thomas Jefferson”

Washington’s words were filled with knowledge and sincerity, and overpowered Alex’s frustration. The younger man knew that Washington had reluctantly but firmly made up his mind, and all that was left was for Thomas to be told that he was being essentially and immediately banished from the presence of others at work as a result of his nudes being unjustifiably leaked.

The Virginian couldn’t even throw himself into his work as a distraction and pretend that everything was normal, when even his presence had the potential to made their situation worse. Alex imagined the hurt expression that would surely cross Thomas’ face when he was told that he’d lost his right to even attend cabinet meetings, and the growing level of resentment strengthened inside of the immigrant.

Alex’s anger wasn’t directed at Washington, seeing as the man was only trying to do his best for all involved, but at their situation. Thomas hadn’t deserved this, and the man was continuously and unjustifiably being punished in so many different ways. Alexander didn’t even care that all he wanted to do right now was pull Thomas into his arms and shield him from everyone and everything. 

“Is that all you wanted to say to me, Sir?” Alex stated bluntly, and Washington blinked at the Federalist’s hard tone of voice.

”Well, I was actually hoping to discuss—“

”Because I would very much like to get back to work now” Alex said as he abruptly stood up from his chair and met Washington’s gaze. Both men held eye contact for another moment, and Alexander was sure that the President would scold him once again for his rudeness.

However, Washington let out an exhausted sigh and nodded.

”Alright son, we’ll discuss this matter at a later date. Please send Secretary Jefferson to my office when you see him” 

Alexander didn’t bother to reply as he left Washington’s office. Resentment and anger thrummed through his veins as he made his way towards his own office, but his mood only worsened at the sight of John Laurens. His best friend appeared to be about to knock on Alex’s office door, and jumped slightly at the immigrant’s sudden presence beside him.

”Oh..uh..hey, Alex” John attempted to smile, but the expression was ruined due to the man’s face supporting a recently split lip and blossoming bruises on his jaw and cheekbones.

”What the hell happened to you?” Alex asked, his tone sounding cold and monotonous in his anger.

John winced slightly and shrugged.

”Got into a fight with some street seller on my way here. Anyway, I wanted to talk to you about—“ 

”Whatever you’ve got to say, I don’t care right now, okay?” Alex muttered, attempting to control his rising negative emotions that directly concerned his best friend.

”Look, Alex. I’m..really sorry about what I did. I didn't mean for any of this to happen, honest” John began hurriedly, but Alex let out an icy bark of laughter.

”Your apology isn’t going to fix anything, and besides, I’m not the one you should be apologising to. I’m not the one you decided to unjustifiably hurt and expose for your own satisfaction”

”Alex, I don’t know how to put this right—“

”There is no ‘putting things right’, John! You’ve fucked up, period. Just..please get out of my way so I can start work”

John stared desperately into Alex’s painfully cold eyes, and the best friends held the gaze for another timeless moment. John proceeded to drop his eyes to the floor and awkwardly shuffle out of Alexander’s way as the immigrant strode into his office and slammed the door shut in his best friend’s face, with John’s apologises still echoing in his head.

Breathing deeply, Alex stormed over to his desk and flung himself aggressively into his desk chair. Grabbing his nearby papers and throwing his laptop unceremoniously onto his desk, Alexander decided to throw himself into his work until the afternoon cabinet meeting. Blocking out all that was going on right now seemed the best option in the circumstances, and Alexander began typing as he pushed all thoughts concerning Thomas Jefferson to the back of his mind.

————————————————————-

However, Alex had only been working for thirty minutes when a commotion occurred outside and his thoughts were abruptly halted at the sudden noise.

Standing up from his desk and peering out of his office window, the first thing that Alexander noticed was the fact that a sizeable crowd of reporters had congregated outside of the building, accompanied by numerous cameras and recording equipment. There had to be over thirty people hovering on the front steps, and a wave of excitement seemed to be rippling through the crowd; reporters were scrabbling around, grabbing their microphones, cameras and notepads as if their lives depended on them.

Frowning in confusion, Alexander’s gaze panned outwards, and the immigrant immediately spotted the source of the reporters’ glee. The figure of Thomas Jefferson was approaching from the car park, and Alexander could see that the man was supporting a dark blue suit and was attempting to keep his head down as he walked briskly towards the building entrance.

Shit

Cursing under his breath, Alex turned and began sprinting out of his office and down the corridor towards the elevators, completely ignoring the confused looks shot his way by coworkers. Reaching the lifts in record time and hammering on the buttons until the lift doors opened, Alex felt his veins throb with adrenaline.

Fuck what Washington or anyone else said about not being seen with Thomas; he had to get the Virginian safely into the building and away from reporters.

The elevator seemed to be moving at an abnormally slow pace, but Alexander was flinging open the doors as soon as he reached the ground floor. By the time the Federalist reached the reception entrance, he could accurately see how the mob of reporters had successfully surrounded Thomas Jefferson as the Virginian attempted to make his way into the building. Alex’s heart leapt at the sight of how uncomfortable and stressed Thomas looked as he continuously refused to speak into the dozens of microphones forcefully thrust into his face, and how the reporters refrained from letting the Secretary of State pass through them freely.

Even from inside, Alexander could hear the numerous questions aggressively shouted by reporters at the Virginian. Countless voices were exclaiming their questions with different levels of aggression and purpose, and Thomas Jefferson was helplessly drowning in the ruthless crowd and overpowering noise.

”Mr Jefferson, how do you feel about having your nudes leaked?”

“Jefferson, are you homosexual?”

”Mr Jefferson, what’s your sexual orientation?”

”Not going to talk to us, huh?” 

”Jefferson! Sir, how would you describe your relationship with Alexander Hamilton?”

”Don’t be shy! Give us some answers here!”

”Jefferson, over here! Jefferson, why did Hamilton leak your nudes?”

”Are you and Alexander Hamilton dating?”

”Mr Jefferson, what’s been the response from the Republican Party regarding the exposure of your nudes?”

”Jefferson, on your left!”

”Talk to us, you Virginian piece of shit! Is Alexander Hamilton one of your lovers?”

”Jefferson, what was George Washington’s response to your behaviour?”

”Sir, are you gay? Our readers are dying to know! Your coming out will be incredibly beneficial for the LGBTQ+ community—”

”Mr Jefferson, do you believe that this scandal involving you and Secretary Hamilton has caused governmental uproar?”

”Sir, how many times have you and Alexander Hamilton exchanged intimate photos?”

”Hey Jefferson, how many inches long is your dick? The photo—“

Dynamically flinging open the entrance door, Alexander Hamilton boldly stood in front of the crowd and opened his mouth to attract the attention of all reporters.

”Hey, dickwads! Have some fucking respect and let Secretary Jefferson pass through—“

His words were lost by another explosion of sounds as the majority of reporters redirected their attentions to Alex and began shouting numerous questions while jostling forwards towards him. Realising that not one of the reporters seemed content in allowing Thomas to pass through, Alex strode down from the steps directly into the crowd.

”Secretary Hamilton, is it true that you’re dating Secretary Jefferson?”

“I don’t believe that’s any of your fucking business! Move out of my way!”

”Hamilton, why did you leak Jefferson’s nudes?”

”Piss off! I need to get through here!”

”Sir, there have been reports that suggest—“

Let me through here! Are you fucking deaf? Get out of the way!”

It seemed to take an age for Alex to even move forwards a couple of metres, and his ears were ringing with the shouts of reporters as he continued shoving his way through the crowd of people. Thankfully, the Federalist knew how to suitably cope when under pressure, and ensured that he blocked everything out as he made his way forwards through the swarm of journalists and paparazzi.

Eventually, Alex caught sight of Thomas’ hunched figure in the swarm of bodies and microphones, and immediately extended his arm towards the Virginian. After a moment, Alex felt Thomas’ shaking hand grab hold of his own like a lifeline, and Alexander began guiding the other man towards the building entrance. Cameras were flashing all around them as journalists continued shouting in response to the Secretaries interacting , but all Alex focused on was getting Thomas Jefferson out of the crowd and into the safety of the building reception.

So much for not being seen with Thomas and pouring fire onto the scandal. But fuck that right now, this was more important. Thomas was more important.

After what felt like hours, both men reached the entrance to the building’s reception. A number of especially ruthless interviewers dared to follow the pair up the building’s stairs, but were met with Alexander slamming the entrance doors shut in their faces. Reporters lingered outside and continued taking notes and photographs, but the stars of the current nude scandal disappearing from sight reduced their interest.

Alexander leaned against the closed doors and ran an exhausted hand over his face. After taking a number of deep breaths in order to compose himself and ensure that his levels of anger were controlled, the man opened his eyes and glanced around. Thankfully no reporters had attempted to enter the building, and the only other people nearby were a number of staring coworkers who quickly averted their gazes when meeting Alex’s eyes.

The immigrant then turned his attention onto the man he’d just essentially rescued, who was also leaning against a nearby wall and shared Alexander’s expression of exhaustion. It was a rare occurrence to see Thomas Jefferson looking anything less than his best at work, but the Virginian’s normally flawless and luxury appearance was noticeably cracking. The man’s eyes were slightly bloodshot and were supported by subtle eye-bags due to lack of sleep, and Jefferson’s mane of curls looked significantly more wild than usual as a likely result of hands being stressfully combed through them. 

”You alright?” Alexander asked lowly after a moment of observation, and Jefferson let out a small chuckle while averting his eyes from Alex’s gaze.

”What do you think?”

The Virginian’s voice was unnaturally empty, and only made it more difficult for Alexander to think of something suitable to say in the increasingly awkward situation.

”So..uh..Washington told me to tell you that he wants to speak with you in his office” Alex spoke uncomfortably, his non-stop mind desperately trying to think of the right thing to speak about. He needed to communicate with Thomas to see how the man was doing, and show that he cared. Thomas didn’t have to be alone in this.

However, the Virginian straightened up and began walking towards the elevator without another word. Alex snapped out from his own thoughts and quickly caught up with the taller man, automatically taking ahold of Thomas’ wrist. The other man looked surprised at the physical contact as the pair established eye contact, but Alexander forced himself to speak with sincerity nevertheless.

“Look, are you okay? The press have been awful, and I’m sure you’re sick of seeing your photo plastered everywhere you look. But I just..want to apologise again, and let you know that..that I’m here for you”

Thomas Jefferson’s eyes shined with something that could have been emotion as the men continued staring into each other’s eyes, and opened his mouth to reply as Alex continued holding his wrist. However, a familiar shout reached the pair’s ears and snapped both secretaries from their connection.

“Thomas!”

Thomas’ wrist was ripped from Alex’s gentle grasp as James Madison appeared on the scene, hurriedly pulling his best friend away from Alexander and expressing nothing but hatred in his fixed glare.

”Don’t you have other lives to be ruining, Secretary Hamilton? Leave him the fuck alone” the short man hissed, grabbing ahold of his best friend’s arm and proceeding to drag Thomas Jefferson from the scene. The man may look small in stature, but James Madison was surprisingly strong and succeeded in leaving Alex standing alone. The immigrant watched as the retreating Virginians began to converse; Madison was animatedly attempting to communicate with Thomas, but Jefferson seemed to have closed himself off and waved away James’ concerns with a shake of his head. 

Snapping his eyes away from the pair, Alexander closed his eyes for a second before striding forwards in the direction of his own office. He should just try to put all thoughts concerning Thomas Jefferson out of his head for the rest of the day if he hoped to achieve anything productive. As Secretary of Treasury, there were always endless papers to file, issues to debate, and money to be managed, as well as Alexander’s incredibly important debt plan....

Wasting the day thinking about a certain Virginian wasn’t going to help in the slightest, and Alex resigned himself to be selfishly productive.

————————————————————

Washington’s afternoon cabinet meeting went as poorly as Alexander had expected. He was met with a roar of jeering and gossip as soon as he entered the meeting room, and the glaring Federalist was incredibly tempted to actively continue the brawl he’d started with John Adams the previous day. However, one imploring stare from Washington forced Alex to remain silent, and the man slumped down silently in his own seat with a clenched jaw and shaking fists.

In an attempt to distract himself from the urge to brawl with his coworkers in an incredibly uncivil manner, Alex internally sighed as he found his mind naturally wandering back to Thomas Jefferson. The Virginian’s absence in the meeting implied that Washington had been able to successfully inform Thomas about his banishment from upcoming cabinet meetings, and Alex found himself absent staring at the empty seat next to James Madison with a heavy heart.

Everything was so fucked up. Why couldn’t Washington just suspend anyone who decided to mess with Thomas and spread the scandal further, instead of removing the one man who could be referred to as the victim of this situation?

The meeting lasted for hours, and Alexander’s mind was incredibly unfocused despite the prime topic of conversation relating directly to his treasury department. The immigrant ensured that he answered any relevant questions directed towards him, but lacked his usual burning passion and remained silent when not addressed. The murmuring and laughter of his coworkers seemed distant, and it was evident to all that Alexander Hamilton wasn’t in the mood for anything confrontational or exciting.

Exhaustion, icy anger and emptiness consumed Alex’s mind completely, and the man uncharacteristically wished nothing more than for the cabinet meeting to end. Washington obviously noticed Alexander’s lack of enthusiasm, and repeatedly glanced towards his secretary in concern, but refrained from commenting upon the matter.

When the meeting finally came to an end, Alex sighed in relief and immediately left the room in order to prevent anyone approaching him. The last thing he needed was another someone offering their opinion about his actions, or asking him about his relationship with Thomas Jefferson. For once in his life, Alexander just wanted to be able to keep his mouth shut and make his way back to his office without getting involved in anything political or otherwise.

Thankfully, the man’s wishes for privacy were granted. Alex reached the safety of his office without any complications occurring, and spent the next four hours attempting to work upon his debt plan. Initially, this was an ideal and productive distraction from everything, but after the fourth hour Alexander remembered how he needed Thomas Jefferson’s signature, approval and influence if his plan had any chance of developing further and being successfully passed.

Therefore, he needed to go and speak with Jefferson.

The walk towards the Virginian’s office was naturally quiet, seeing as work hours had ended and the majority of coworkers had gone home for the weekend. The sound of Alex’s footsteps echoed slightly down the darkened corridor, and the man concentrated on the best way to approach talking about his debt plan. Assuming that the Virginian was still at work, of course.

The light shining underneath Thomas Jefferson's closed office door indicated that the Virginian was still present, but Alex hesitated as a wave of nervousness twisted within his stomach. He’d never found it so difficult to talk to Jefferson before, and wondered how the man would react to Alexander’s proposals in light of their current... personal situation.

No answers were going to be found on the man’s doorstep, and Alexander knocked firmly on the door after another tense moment. However, instead of being met with the Virginian’s drawling voice, silence was the only reply he received.

Alex knocked again with a slight frown creasing his forehead. It was unlike Thomas to ignore anyone knocking at his door, no matter the reason. This wasn’t looking good...

”Jefferson? It’s me, Ale—Hamilton” 

When Alexander still heard no reply from his rival, impatience twisted in his gut and the immigrant squared his shoulders and boldly entered into the office. If Thomas was going to ignore him, he could at least have the decency to verbally tell Alex to “go away” instead of acting like a fucking five year old—-

Alex’s frustrated thoughts abruptly halted as the man observed Jefferson’s office. The room was fairly organised, apart from the central desk which was occupied by a mountain of files and papers. The federalist had expected to see Thomas Jefferson writing at said desk, but the sight before his eyes wasn’t one he’d ever predicted to observe.

Thomas was present at his desk, but the man’s body was slumped forwards. The Virginian was resting his arms among his papers and across the desk space, with his head gently resting atop his forearms. Thomas had his eyes closed and mouth ever so slightly open, and it was evident to any sane individual that the man was deeply sleeping and completely oblivious to everything and everyone.

Alexander stared at the man he fought with almost every day, and immediately noticed how unexpectedly peaceful Thomas looked when he slept. The Virginian always looked much older when he was angrily fighting or frustratedly arguing with Alex, but the man’s completely blank and comfortable features allowed Alexander to remember how young Thomas actually was; the tall, handsome and mature man was actually in his mid twenties, and only a couple of years younger then Alex himself.

Seeing his rival like this, completely ridden of anger, pain and emotion, had Alexander staring for a prolonged period of time. This calm and relaxed version of Jefferson looked...hell, Thomas looked fucking adorable. But that observation wasn’t relevant right now; the Virginian was clearly exhausted and had inadvertently succumbed to passing out at his work desk while apparently attempting to organise his files.

The incredible amount of stress, humiliation and pain that Jefferson had been subjected to in the last couple of days had clearly physically taken its toll on the man. Perhaps sleeping was one of the only ways in which the man could momentarily escape from his current hellish reality...

Sighing with a mixture of resignation and guilt, Alexander pushed all thoughts concerning his debt plan to the back of his mind as he cautiously approached Thomas until he was close enough to touch the man. The Virginian’s regulated breathing and almost inaudible snores could be heard, and a fleeting smile passed over Alex’s face at the knowledge that Jefferson snored when sleeping.

As much as he knew Thomas’ body obviously needed to recuperate via sleeping, Alexander knew that leaving Thomas alone in the building overnight wasn’t an option. The man needed to be in his own apartment tonight in order to start the following day well and prepared, and sleeping at one’s own desk never did any favours to the state of the individual’s back. Alexander has overworked himself countless times and could personally confirm this fact.

Slowly extending out his hand, Alex placed his palm onto Thomas’ shoulder and produced a gentle shake when the man failed to respond to his initial touch.

”Hey, Thomas, come on it’s time to wake up”

The Virginian let out a sleepy mumble as his slumber continued, and Alex found himself biting back a chuckle despite himself as his shaking continued.

”Wakey wakey sleeping beauty! Come on, Thomas, you gotta get up now”

The continuous moving of his shoulder and the incessant whispering finally succeeded in rousing Thomas from his sleep, and the man slowly opened his clouded eyes with an exhausted groan. There were a priceless few seconds where Thomas met Alex’s slightly amused gaze and simply stared in drowsy confusion, but a moment later the eye contact was broken as Thomas Jefferson jumped in his seat with shock at having his face in close proximity to Alexander Hamilton’s.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope this chapter was alright, and i hope everyone has great Christmases xx


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